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18 year old from Norway quitting for good


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Hello

 

My name is Torleif and I have been playing video games since I was 6 six years old. Finding words to describe how much video games have ruined my life is not easy, so I would rather tell you about how I have tried to change for the better in the previous three years until now.

In 2013 I moved to a private christian boarding school (not christian btw) to try to break my gaming addiction. Up until that I had been playing constantly 4-6 hours a day for a year, mainly League of Legends. I was hoping that this would change me for the better but alas, i failed. Many of the new friends that I met at the boarding school were gamers also, and they quickly sucked me into the addiction again. I ended up almost failing in math by the end of the year, though i had an A+ from primary school, and my family was extremely disappointed in me. Most of all, I was disappointed in myself.

I tried again to fight my addiction by travelling to the US as an exchange student for a year and this time I really screwed up. In the US I met some of the best people I had ever met, who were kind, interesting and funny. They were the people I had always wanted to hang out with, but my social anxiety got the best of me. I joined after school activities such as cross-country running, but it still was not enough. I ended up spending my time with people I did not feel comfortable with, who were gamers and procrastinators just like me. Though I managed to not play any video games for 10 months, I was still watching it on Youtube, Twitch, reading gaming news and so on.

Coming back to Norway again made me realise I was never fully clean. To truly quit video games I have to completely avoid everything that has to do with it and replace it with new hobbies and passions. That's why I broke off contact with all my gamer friends in Norway (who were mean and rude), change my mindset from fixed to growth and finally quit school. I did this because a site called Udacity was guaranteeing a job through their online program (https://www.udacity.com/course/machine-learning-engineer-nanodegree--nd009). Now I wake up at 5am Monday-Friday doing math for 8 hours so I can take the online degree.

 I have turned to this site in hopes of getting help with keeping my gaming addiction under control, or better yet get rid of it completely. I have relapsed several times the past two months, installing League of Legends for a day and playing 6-8 hours, then uninstalling it again. Also this whole time I have been watching gaming related stuff also. It feels like I am fighting a big, fire breathing dragon inside my head that wants to play or watch video games. I can only fight it for so long before it forces me to do these things.

  • I really hope this site will change me for the better, and not let me wither away again. :ph34r:
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I really hope this site will change me for the better, and not let me wither away again. :ph34r:

It definitely will help! Stay involved and be a member of the community. Here you'll find a group of very encouraging and supportive people on the same journey as you. Finding like-minded people to support me was one of the BEST things I've ever done to truly live a better life.

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Välkommen Torleif! 

Du är inte ensam. Det du upplever är precis vad många av oss upplever. Läs journaler och ställ vilka frågor du vill, tittat också på Cams videos dom är väldigt hjälpsamma.

Ser fram emot att läsa din journal inom en snar framtid.Vi kommer hjälpa dig igenom det här :) 

 

English: 

Welcome Torleif!

You are not alone. What you experience is what many of us do aswell. Please read the journals on this site and have a look at Cams videos they are very helpfull.

I am looking forward to read your journal in a future soon. We will help you :) 

Edited by Danielk
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  • 9 months later...

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