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Progress Report


Alex Ericson

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Day 5: 

 Decided to wake up and go on a nice hike up on the front range.  It also is the road I will be running down for the marathon i'm doing in June so that was cool to see what I'm up for.  The morning was pretty gloomy and cold, rainy out so we didn't hike that much.  Then we went to lunch and had some awesome pizza and beers, it was a nice day even though it was not such great weather we made the most of it.  I actually included my girlfriend in my plan to quit gaming and she fully understands why I want to quit now so that was very reassuring to have her on board.  I told her that gaming for me is a pre-occupation like Cam told me and that often times when I'm doing something else I'm focused on gaming and what I could be doing instead of enjoying the moment and she didn't like that my mind was elsewhere when I was hanging out with her.  It never really got to that point of me not focusing on her yet and I let her know that is one of the reasons why I want to stop gaming before the pull gets to strong and I can't resist the urge to game.  If that happens than I usually start lying to people to get more time to game.  I will begin to start making false plans with people in order to free myself up to game more.  I just don't find that very respectable and nice anymore to be lying to my friends and loved ones in order for me to live out my addiction like that, it seems selfish to me now.  

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Day 6:  Mothers Day!

Slept in a little bit today to get some extra zzz's.  Planned to go to take my Mom out to brunch at around 2pm and a little bit before my brother called me and asked if I could pick him up because his car broke down.  I was a little bummed out about this because it'd take an extra hour of driving to go get him.  Instead of being upset I just accepted my responsibility and decided to go get him.  It was fun catching up with him while driving to brunch and the chit chat was nice.  We even talked about addictions and vices together because he is addicted to smoking and I told him about trying to give up gaming and he was supportive of it fully, even admitting to me that he just gave it up and took out his internet too so that was exciting to hear that he too is trying to move on from games.  

We all had a nice time at brunch together and my girlfriend even went with us to celebrate because her family is out of state so that was nice for us all to hang out like that and have awesome food!  Afterwards I had to drive my brother back home with my gf and she suggested we all go bowling to kill some time before dinner.  We had an amazing time together the 3 of us!  There is hope out there to enjoy life more without the need of gaming.  Having moments like this weekend make me want to touch base with old friend and keep the ones I have closer.  Maybe I have been very neglectful of them over the years because gaming always was in the way...who knows maybe I will make some new friends too!

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Day 7:

On my way to work I listened to an audio book, Water for Elephant.  Actually I might finish the book tomorrow on the drive into work and I'm really looking forward to that!  I don't always listen to audiobooks when I go to work, sometimes it can be a bit much to digest, so music sometimes helps relax me better, but this books is just intense.  Work is getting pretty busy, I'm undertaking more responsibilities and hope I can handle the work load to rise up higher in the industry.  I find that I'm more excited and focused about work lately and I'm looking for new ways to better myself.  Afterwork I drove home, listened to the audio book ;), and decided to relax and watch a street racing show with my Dad.  Usually I'd race to get on my computer as quickly as possible to start gaming, but now it is just not important to me.  After that I decided to clean up my room a bit and get ready for my hockey game tonight.  At the hockey game I was personable, asking people how they are and stuff, being more engaging.  The game went pretty well too, I scored a goal by using the other teams defender as a screen and blasted one 5 hole on the goalie.  We we ended up losing, but we will get them next time!  I'm looking forward to this week, it is going to be a big challenge for me!  My parents are going on a 2 week motorcycle trip and I'm house sitting.  In the past I'd be jumping up and down and up and down about having unabated gaming time with now judgement from anyone!!!  I'd get beer and chew then game until my eyes fell out!!  Aww the good old days!  The struggle is going to be real.  My plan is to finish reading respawn and focus on the betterment of my life.  Get things in my life in order and in a good place with out people judging what I'm changing, I think this will be much much more healthy then gaming and I'm excited!!

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Awesome job just rolling with it and using the extra time with your brother to spend quality time. I bet in the past if you were gaming you would have responded differently. That's a key thing to notice!

We gotta play hockey some time ;)

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Day 8:

Whelp week 1 is out of the way!  Started out the day by waking up early and seeing my parents off to their motorcycle trip.  I then took it easy and readied for work, eating my breakfast and drinking coffee, pretty much the typical morning routine I do.  At work I was focused and motivated to get as much work done as possible and it went quite well.  I did finish the book Water for Elephants today and that was one extraordinary book.  I know it is not a non-fiction personal development type book, but I did enjoy the story quite a lot and the were a lot of facts pulled from circus culture and used in the book, including an actual elephant that would pull his stake out of the ground, carry it, then go steal lemonade before returning back to the tent and placing his stake back in the ground like nothing happened haha what a character!

Today was also the first day I implemented using a calendar system to better track my time and it really did help motivate me to obligations I need to meet, especially when tired.  After work I came home cooked myself a dinner, walked the dog, watched the new Thrones episode, learned some Spanish, journaled, and read too.  Pretty impressive what you can do with your time when it is allocated properly instead of being laid to waste.  I'm going to continue on with this program and keep trying to fill up my time with meaningful activities that I enjoy.  It is a bit late right now, but I'm also trying to work in meditation with the website headspace, hoping to try that out when I'm not too tired, I'm thinking even after I get home from work just to clear my head a bit?  Food for thought!

 

@Cam Adair  Ya man we should go play sometime that would be fun!  I think I did see on one of your videos you were talking about being in minor league hockey?  That is crazy you'd show me what's up with hockey.  Do you still play??

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I don't play often anymore but I played AAA for most of my career until I was 18. Could definitely show you a thing or two :D

Calendar system is a game changer. I'm not sure what I would do without it. Well, I know what I would do. Nothing.

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Day 9:

Not the best of days.  I woke up and was suppose to run 5 miles ended up running 3.8.  Figured I'd run after work to make up the rest, but it didn't happen.  At work I kept messing up little things and getting very aggravated at things not working.   It seemed like nothing was working quite right today.  Even the new audiobook I got was terrible...couldn't really win at anything today.  I know I'm suppose to remain positive, but it days like today where you just want to scream.  I calmly accepted my bad day and did the best I could to correct for it.  When I came home that was the real challenge.  I decided to go for a walk with the dog to relax and get my mind away.  I did enjoy this quite a lot.  Then I made my dinner and burnt it of course lol...go figure.  Actually then I made a second dinner after trying to eat the first one and the second one was much better.  I was suppose to do all these new activities today to better my life, but instead I decided to watch Avengers Age of Ultron, because I never seen it before.  Movies are probably not the best alternative to gaming, I just couldn't get motivated.  Maybe handling the little things that go wrong through out a day will get better as I progress through my detox.  I know I need to keep with the program and everything and hope to start fresh tomorrow with a new day to look forward too!  Hey there is one positive on the day is I didn't relapse, so I do have that to brag to myself about!  

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A question I do have on my mind is, what does everyone else do with there systems or computers when they are intending to quit gaming?  Do you store your system (keep it out of sight), give to a friend, sell it, or re-purpose it for other activities?  I'm curious about this and if anybody feel the urge to answer that would be awesome.

 

When I've started my detox I sold my nintendo ds because console is a strictly gaming system, on the other way, I kept my laptop for everyday usage, but uninstalling games was necessary.

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I just deleted most games, except for the 50 gigs one I simply haven't touched and maybe a few smaller ones. Did delete the desktop shortcuts and that was it. I even keep my steam open at all times to keep up with my gaming buddies. It really depends on the person and how much they trust themselves/know they can ignore having any game in their system. I mean one could just open a browser and play, you can't completely remove temptation unless you give up electronics.

Anyway, yes, I uninstalled all games I actually played or remembered about. I usually stick to my desktop so temptation is small.


Btw you can always just go linux, it will solve any gaming problem

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Thanks guys for all the comments, it means a lot!

Day 10:

Haven't been able to update my journal so I'm going to do a couple days.  Day 10 was pretty good and a lot better than day 9 was.  I woke up in better spirits, even found a much better audiobook to drive to work with.  Work still was a bit chaotic, but it's easy to get over it with the weekend so close.  I went to the store during my lunch break and picked up some tater tots and a bagged salad for the dinner I'm making my gf tonight.  She is coming over to my house and we are suppose to watch game of thrones, sit on the deck, drink some beers, and have some yummy burgers off the grill.  We had a very nice relaxing time together, except when she fell down the stairs and bruised her tail bone hahaha...what are the odds?!  Poor thing.  

No real connections were made  to gaming, well except when she brought up my computer desk being disassembled and now used as a docking station, she didn't understand that, but I do when I have a tough day and the barrier to play is too low then I will just do it and start gaming again.  I have a pretty busy weekend ahead even having friday off with the lady all day so thats going to be nice!

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Day 11:

Friday off from work, woohoo!!  Slept in bed too long and I didn't care too much, today is suppose to be a nice relaxing day!  The gf's rear end is way too sore to go hiking, not my doing haha, so we are just going to chill on the deck and read some books together and lounge around.  I read a bit of books, but ultimately got her involved in learning spanish on duolingo with me.  We didn't  even watch any TV today, honestly we were content reading our books and enjoying the company together.  She did manage to get some laundry done too so it was a winning day!

Later that day we went to a food truck festival in Northglenn, the city I grew up in.  I showed her the elementary and middle school I went to and even my childhood home and friends homes...totally dumps now, but nothing ever compares to how we remember our homes and childhood memories.  I remember riding our bikes around the Cul-De-Sac and getting into trouble with the neighbor kids.  There wasn't a video game in sight, just some kids racing bikes and playing hide n go seek to pass the time.  One of my favorites was climbing my tree, too high for a parents sanity, so I can see the whole city high up.  I always got such a big kick out of that, seeing what others didn't see from where I was in my tree.  I'd have binoculars and even my telescope so I can spy on what people were doing around the city it was fascinating!!  Anyways the festival was very enjoyable, we had some beers and walked around, ended up getting food at a restaurant because the food truck lines were way too long and they were sold out of food by the first 2 hours...not prepared at all.  I had a nice talk with the gf that really touched my soul and helped me understand why I'm doing this, why i'm trying to improve myself always everyday and what I do it for.  

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Day 12, 13 and 14 lol:

Missing some of my days here, had a busy weekend there is nothing wrong with that.  I wish I had more time to update this journal more often and will try my best to do that.

On saturday I went on an 18 mile run in the morning time and it was insane.  I was attacked by a crazy ass stray dog that these homeless people had, with no leash.  Luckily I didn't get bit or anything like that so I continued on and was dead tired after running, I seriously barely made it back home.  The way I look at it though is I'm getting the pain out of the way now in order to succeed on marathon day!  I have a 20 mile run next week and then the marathon a couple weeks from then, so I'm looking forward to getting it done with haha!  After running I just vegged out an relaxed, showered, ate, and readied myself for the rest of the day at a leisurely pace.  I then met up with friends to go to a baseball game downtown.  It was a ton of fun to see everybody like that.  Unfortunately the weather was pretty terrible so we left pretty early and I went home so dang tired, but it was worth every bit!

On sunday I lounged around in the morning relaxing a lot trying to recover from the running the day prior.  I mostly just read some books and articles while waiting for the gf to come over to watch game of thrones lol.  When she came over we went out for some damn good mexican food!!  Not too much of a highlight for sunday except that it was nice and enjoyable.  I finished off the night watching the new episode of thrones, which I probably shouldn't have watched it so late, but I couldn't help it.  

Some food for thought is I feel like my sleep is suffering a little bit, maybe from the running I have become tired, but I can figure out what my body is telling me a whole lot easier with out gaming.  One other thing is I've been trying to take on a minimalistic life and living with less items in my life and can say that it was one of the best things I have ever done.  I'm not entirely minimalist, but I find that I have made such huge progress in my attempts and it really allows me to appreciate what I have and to be more thoughtful about what I am going to buy.  I find the simplicity so interesting and blissful.  One thing though is I'm involved in quite a bit of activities like hockey, cycling, running, hiking, fishing...so needless to say I have a lot of 'gear', but I enjoy them all and intend to keep the gear because it is useful for me.  One thing though that minimalism has helped me with is the excess of clothing and digital crap I had laying around, it truly was astounding!  

One last disclaimer is I'm partaking in the 30 day challenge and am pretty damn nervous about it haha, I will let you know how it goes :)

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Day 15:

Woke up and looked at my day 1 challenge, it was fun and rewarding to think of these things though out my day and answer question with my free time.  Some of the questions really did get my brain thinking about things and helped for me to realize that there is a big big world out there and it is all for whatever I want to use it for, daunting yes, but also inspiring that I can, with enough effort, change myself and help others.   

Work went great today I was curious about everything and mindful/focused on the tasks I was doing.  There is a lot to learn and that is cool that I have a job I enjoy and want to learn as much as I can about it.  I think with all this free time I can develop more interest and also study about my career and really focus on this.  

On my way home for work and Sorrow by Bad Religion came on the radio and I couldn't help but sing along.  This got me to thinking that I use to play acoustic guitar in my free time during one of my longest hiatus's from gaming.  Maybe I should look into buying myself another guitar to see if I'd enjoy it just as much as I did.  Plus Sorrow would sound so cool slowed down as an acoustic!  Another thing is that guitar playing builds achievement and is something to be proud of...it's challenging, fun, stress relieving, pretty much all the things gaming gives to you...hmm maybe it's time to shake off the cobwebs from my wallet and build up those callouses once more.

 

A link to the song :)

https://youtu.be/t1-OOj38QpM 

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Day 16,17:

Been working on the challenge the past few days and it has been insightful.  I'm still game free and I'm proud of that.  I have been watching a lot of comic book movies lately, but I needed to catch up on them I'm super far behind on all the stories and people at work talk about it all the time so I'm trying to assimilate a bit haha.  They also were in a heated conversation about gaming and I eavesdropped a little bit, but ultimately knew it was not my place to talk about gaming anymore, rather save it as a shocking story for someone when I tell them and they say no way!!  Hopefully not too the extent where they go buy the game and set it in front of my face like that one guy did to Cam...I would probably cave in if someone challenged me.

Work has been super super stressful this week and I have been staying busy by reading and doing some activities around the house.  Focusing on the challenges and respawn has also been helpful to take my mind off of things.  Also had a nice time out with friends during the week.  I find that it has become slightly easier to deal with my stress issues and figure out what is truly bothering, take a step back, and then act on how to improve it.  

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