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Larry's Detox Journal


Somebodyelse

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Day 83 (No Fap Day 61)

School is over next week. Just need to do an essay over one topic I learned in my linguistic class that changed my way of thinking, study for the linguistic exam, and prepare for my presentation in my programming class (Shouldn't be that difficult already have the power point done).  If all goes well I'll be done by Wednesday and only need to other student's presentations the following week.

During the week I present my presentation I plan on going to a church/fellowship conference that weekend God willing near Kansas City Missouri.

 

 

Exit: I forgot to add during this past week. I was listening to some video game music and I wondered if there were extra songs in a bonus world of a game I used to play. So I didn't realize until I finished watching the video, but I was watching gameplay of the game instead of letting it play to hear if there was any new songs. That shows me I can't mess around with that. For me personally I'm going to have give up listening to video game music in the areas I control. Or else it will lead to a lot of past memories and might make/urge me to want to buy a game system or PC game again. I really do appreciate the hard work that goes into making a video game and it's music though.

With No Fap I'm usually good at avoiding pornogroahic material, but sometimes on art sites I visit in the galleries of different artists collages some of the preview thumbnails have that material exposed still. Just recently I found out you can set age rating filter, so I'm doing that now to teen only level to avoid any mishaps from happening in the future. Didn't give into masterbuation.

 

Edited by Somebodyelse
Forgot to add details of my past week and wanted to be honest with my experiences during that week and this week.
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Day 89 (No Fap Day 67)

This week is going well.  For some reason I've had a couple video game related dreams especially this past Sunday.  I was watching an animated movie and one voice actress sounded familiar from a video game I used to play.  So I decided to listen to an old video game interview with her in it.  Turns out it wasn't her and it was someone else. :( 

Also for No Fap staying away from pornographic material, but on Tumblr someone that posts that type of material liked one of my posts and I saw stuff I didn't want to see, but quickly backed out.  Also turns out Tumbler supports that type of posting and even  with safe search enabled on the site I came across material I didn't want to see.  So I guess I'm never going to use the search function on Tumbler anymore. :P

 Tomorrow I plan on taking the Greyhound bus to Missouri for a church conference.  Hope to help the church over there and receive any spiritual help that I need and didn't know I needed through prayer.

I know a lot of video game announcements happen these coming months so I need to stay strong with God's help not to waste my time with all that mess. Won't count the 90 day detox until the 90th day is over.

 

Hope anyone that is reading this is having a blessed day in Jesus name! :) <3

 

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Larry,

Holy crap - ONE MORE DAY!!!! I was never a big fan of religion (forced to be an altar boy as a kid can really push you away from Church) but it sounds like that really worked for you! Tons of video games announcements coming, I agree with you there - we'll definitely make it.

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Larry,

Holy crap - ONE MORE DAY!!!! I was never a big fan of religion (forced to be an altar boy as a kid can really push you away from Church) but it sounds like that really worked for you! Tons of video games announcements coming, I agree with you there - we'll definitely make it.

We need to be strong. :) A lot of this video game stuff requires time and that's time I don't want to give and money too. Plus it will continue to ask for that stuff years to come if we wanted to keep up to the latest video games. Cool avatar by the way.

      With religion it can't be forced at all. It's up to every individual to make that decision for themselves.  Like how Jesus spoke about how he was the bread of life. Other Christians can't go around shoving the word of God down people throats metaphorically speaking. They can only set a good example, serve others, and present the gospel. Anything else needs to be asked/allowed by the other person listening. I'm for open air preaching, but to me needs to be about the gospel and incorporate prayer. A lot of religions exist, but only one of them has  a real relationship with God.  God knows we are going to mess up sometimes that's one of the reason Jesus's dieing & resurrection took place besides for our sins to be taken away and to be restored back to God with a relationship with him.  

Edit: Also it's important to for God to tell us when we are saved/have that relationship. An old evangelist named John Weasly preached the gospel for a couple years without being saved. 

End of editing

 

    To me a lot of Chrisitans need to serve people more and prayer  instead of listening to sermons only. (Putting that standard on myself as well)  Then maybe people would take us more seriously

Short story about Jesus critizing the religious people.

One whole chapter Jesus critizing religious people

Edited by Somebodyelse
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Day 91 (No Fap Day 69)

Finally completed the detox with God's help. Thanks for everyone for the encouragement you gave me and anyone that may have read this journal even if they didn't post in it.

    Now I want to continue with the No Fap as well. The only way I would go back in video games if God told me to, but I'm sure he wants me to improve other parts of myself like study habits. ^_^

 

Hope everyone that is in the detox will complete it too. Stay strong many game announcents are coming. :) B|

 

Also if anyone lives in the Dallas Texas area or is coming by. Please PM me if you want to try hanging out sometime.

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Day 94 (No Fap 70)

I came back from my conference yesterday.  When I got home around 10:00PM  I decided to watch a video game trailer. Which lead to  3 1/2 hours of wasted time.  Today too I spent about an hour reading some video game related info and watching gameplay.  All this shows there is no way I can go back to gaming and just need to stay away from it as far as possible.  With this occurrence of these events i listed above occurred because I didn't put any effort to prevent myself.  I just sat in there and didn't even get up.   I know that I'am passionate about video games, but just need to realize that can't be part of my life anymore if I want to move on to the next chapter of my life and be more responsible & independent.  Also maybe this occurred because I was being prideful when, instead I should be more humble and thankful  that each day of being video game free is a big blessing for me.

  With all that said I'm currently at school researching an essay I need to work on over what I learned in my linguistics class.  Once that gets finished I hope to work on my writing skills over the summer.  I hope everyone is having a blessed day! :)  Thanks for everyone reading this and listening to the journey and process of overcoming my video game addiction/temptation I'm dealing with. :x

 

(For some reason it wouldn't let me remove the bold letter in the words above)

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Wasting time I understand that and I agree with you but I'm not all against watching gaming related stuff,sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it is not as big as we make it in our minds.

Have a nice day!

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Day 94 (No Fap 70)

I came back from my conference yesterday.  When I got home around 10:00PM  I decided to watch a video game trailer. Which lead to  3 1/2 hours of wasted time.  Today too I spent about an hour reading some video game related info and watching gameplay.  All this shows there is no way I can go back to gaming and just need to stay away from it as far as possible.  With this occurrence of these events i listed above occurred because I didn't put any effort to prevent myself.  I just sat in there and didn't even get up.   I know that I'am passionate about video games, but just need to realize that can't be part of my life anymore if I want to move on to the next chapter of my life and be more responsible & independent.  Also maybe this occurred because I was being prideful when, instead I should be more humble and thankful  that each day of being video game free is a big blessing for me.

  With all that said I'm currently at school researching an essay I need to work on over what I learned in my linguistics class.  Once that gets finished I hope to work on my writing skills over the summer.  I hope everyone is having a blessed day! :)  Thanks for everyone reading this and listening to the journey and process of overcoming my video game addiction/temptation I'm dealing with. :x

 

(For some reason it wouldn't let me remove the bold letter in the words above)

Congrats on reaching the 90 day milestone! I'll be joining you in a few days time xD

It's good to see that you were honest with yourself when examining your relationship with gaming, I intend to do similar post-detox.

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(No Fap 73)

So I finished school for this semester yesterday.  Also on Tuesday I wasted some time looking a video game related media & websites, but not as much compared to Monday.  Currently watching a movie called "Beware of Christians" pretty good so far.  A group of college students travel to Europe and rediscover what it means to be a Christian and not how America defines. it.

 

- Thankful for other day of life and more opportunities to learn, help others, and improve myself.

 

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(No Fap 79)

This past week and weekend have been very bumpy ride for me.  Wasted time watching video game related media and on websites.  Recently too finished up the semester and college.   So now I have much free time that I can't just leave unorganized or else it can lead to temptation to waste time with video game related stuff.  Continuing to be honest so I can be accountable and not discourage others to tell the truth & make sure the problems of wasting time with video game media doesn't get any worse.

     So this week I need to set some small goals or activities to do, that I will eventually increase.  Another reason that I fell back into that habit was I missed communicating with my friends that I played video games with.  So even though I like them very much and pray they will have a blessed life through Christ I need to stop communicating with them, unless they contact me over some non video game important related  discussion.

 

    I'm considering to start a short story later this week and hope that goes well.  Lastly I graduate tomorrow and I hope i don't  trip on stage. lol

- Thankful for hearing and that opportunity brings to enjoy the good and bad sounds out there

P.S.   Hope everyone has a blessed the rest of the week and stand strong against video games.  :) <3

 

P.S.S  Enjoyed this quote below.

" If you're tired of starting over, stop giving up" - Shia LaBeouf

Edited by Somebodyelse
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  • 2 weeks later...

(No Fap 87)

This week has been a experience.  With all this free time I've used some of it wisely, but most of it unwisely.  Most of it was listening to music, (some of that music was from video games) visited some video game websites (only read articles) and watched people talk about video games & reviewing some of them on YouTube.   By God's grace I didn't participate in any forum talk or view people's opinion about video games on a forum.  

With spending my time wisely I finished a book about how  depending on a person's experience with their earthly father can put God in a box and that isn't a good thing.  Cause God be put into a box.  Also participated in an accountability partner discussion over Skype.  He brought up a very good point that I never thought of before.  With giving up video games a person leaves behind all the stress that was there & potentially can brought on to one's self.  So a lot of the time we bring up a positive things we may miss, but might forget about bringing up the negative side of video games.

This last point I'm going make is personal and going to relate it to "No Fap".  For some reason two days ago I had a wet dream and in that dream sex didn't occur only the person of opposite sex was leaning towards me closely/attempting to make out with me (We both still had our cloths on).  I woke up though as they were leaning towards very closely.  Does anyone know why wet dreams occur sometimes, especially if I don't look at sexual related material before I go to bed?  It just happened out of the blue to me.

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(Detoxes complete) (Post Detoxes Day 1 officially) 

This past week has been going well.   Still continuing Skype accountability meetings.  I was going to watch a game play video, but i stopped two minutes or so into the video by God's grace.  I listened a couple of video game songs, but received no enjoyment out of it.  Going to research a new genre or band I haven't heard before.  To help me stay away from video game music.  Getting back into the groove with spending time with God and breaking in my new bible because my old one was damaged.
 

  • Grateful for my new bible even though it might be hard to read, since it's 1599 version
  • Grateful for he ability to get a  clean glass of water whenever I want in my house
  • Grateful to hangout  with my parents
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(Detoxes complete) (Post Detoxes Day 8 officially) 


Going to keep this journal kind of short.  Didn't really look into new music genres this week.  Been busy & my mom had go to the hospital because of a mini stroke she had.  It was a combination of stress and combination of myself & sister arguing over dumb stuff, that we shouldn't have a made a big deal out of in the first place.  By God's grace nothing damaging happened to her and to describe in her own words.  "It felt like a warning".  So I take it as a sign to stop making a big deal out of tasks she wants me to do, don't interrupt (no matter how I feel at the time),  and most of the time don't talk back because it makes the situation worse.

 

As for staying away from video games I didn't listen to any video game related music, but i wasted a hour or a little more than that looking at articles & watching a video about FGC (Fighting Game Community).  So there was gameplay shown.  Besides that I finished two books.  Still reading my bible and started yesterday Pilgrims Progress by john Bunyan.

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