This is a really big impediment for growth.

Can someone share knowledge on this. I just keep encountering the “if people would have treated me better” obstacle. This sort of obstacle makes me lose sight of my responsibilities and leads to a fall in the quality of my work. What sort of actions can I take to show myself I haven’t lost. 
 

I got healed in the past when i was criticized for my failures and had day to day improvement. My current colleague burns his time on social media and only commends me for what is an average quality. Never has he highlighted mistakes to me in a proper way.
 

Ever since this started happening, I , for lack of things to worry about, started identifying things that aren’t good, but I can do nothing about. Getting angry, excusing myself and shirking responsibility. I understand that Im losing skills, so I have to switch to a more challenging role.

Edited November 29, 20241 yr by Amphibian220

My dad is an alcoholic, 40+ years sobber, big into AA, and he always held the following prayer dear to his heart:

Quote

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

While I haven't pleaded with the divine to grant me the same (serenity, courage, and wisdom), it is not like I haven't wished for it at all.  When my observations are sound, if I truly find myself acting on anger at the things I can deduce are largely outside of my control, it may simply be because I perceive it as easier than the alternative, which would require change.  Change is hard my friend, especially the kind whose beneficial outcomes aren't immediate and familiar to us, it takes courage/trust.

You're realization that you "have to switch to a more challenging role" - i.e., taking responsibility - makes it sound like you're on that path.  Let me know if you find that courage/trust, I know I could use some myself.

Thanks Patrick, Im not going to be a loser tomorrow. No social media crap and no self pity.

My friend will judge a medieval sword fight tournament. I want to go and see it.

Edited December 5, 20241 yr by Amphibian220