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dirkj3

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Posts posted by dirkj3

  1. Hello

     

    It has been awhile

    I am done with gaming i quitted on saturday last week

    I feel overwhelmed with taking responsibililty in my life

    i cannot go any further if I dont make meditation as a habit

    I am afraid that my gaming addiction is turning into a yt binge addiction

     

    The entertainment part of me wanting instant gratification is extremely strong on friday evenings

    Just because it is weekend

    This has always been an extreme time every week i Can remember.

    I am facing the toughest time in the week as well as I am tired and it is late  like 12pm

    Those are the key cues for me hitting my weaknesses!

     

    Wish me luck!

     

     

  2. 2 hours ago, Cam Adair said:

    It's great that you found a friend who is fairly supportive. Make sure you continue to check in with yourself and have firm boundaries. It's easy to go back down a road of gaming in "moderation" only to slowly spiral out of control again. 

    That's right!!

     

  3. On 1/4/2018 at 11:34 PM, superiggy said:

    Hey dirkj3, good stuff! :D Keep it up!

    I've read The Slight Edge and I enjoyed it. :) 

    Books I'd recommend about short-long term gratification, the best I've read is The Willpower Instinct, by Kelly McGonigal. Without a doubt.

    Another great book on that subject (although not as awesome as the previously mentioned) is Switch, by Dan Heath.

    Hi superiggy 

    I habe ordered Kelly Mcgonigal the willpower habit

    I still have a few chapters to read on The slight edge!!

  4. On 1/29/2018 at 8:48 PM, Remigjus said:

    Man, I think I'm in the same boat as  you are ( or somewhat simillar). The past 5 months were kinda shit for me. Lots of procrastination, relapsed a bunch of times on NoFap, social media still bugs me. Depressive thoughts pop up from time to time. What's worse, that I've lost the burning desire to accomplish my music dream. I feel kinda empty from the inside. Time runs so fast... Yesterday went by so quick  that it seems like it was just today... Like I'm just pointlessly  existing on this earth. I feel so fucking stuck. Like a month ago I've started to binge watch this speed run channel. After a while, I found myself watching streams. I don't feel any cravings to game again so no worries. I don't even know why I kept watching these streams/gaming videos. So many areas in my life need improvement but I didn't even make any new changes. IT'S BEEN ALMOST TWO FUCKING YEARS and I've barely accomplished anything. I'm surely one of a kind. I know that this lack of control will fuck me up in the long run, but I still ain't doing anything lmao.

    Anyway, sorry for posting this here Hitaru, your story just felt somewhat relatable to me :)

     

    Same with me!!

     

    • Like 1
  5. On 1/31/2018 at 10:59 PM, Hitaru said:

    I'm fluent in normal conversation you could say, then I read an actual book written in English (by a native, not a foreigner) and it's like "Well, crap". So much vocabulary, that I can understand but can't remember for use later.

    I'm sure you will man. These things pass. They'll pass either you give up or not, but if you give up it'll only take longer. So don't. Focus in getting it right asap, and don't be too hard with yourself. You can do this!

    The last few paragraphs really nailed it!!!

    Keep it up!!!

    • Like 1
  6. Hello 

    I am not interested in games anymore they don't satisfy me anymore.

    I feel screwed I talked about that woth my dad that I feel isolated and depressed I thought about suicide.

    They don't understand my problem with gaming addiction  I cannot explain them anything because they don't understand.

    I cannot put a blanket about my problems anymore.

    I am screwed I have no real friends I never played multilayer games 

    Most of all II am afraid that nothing will change from its own 

    no problems will disappear all that I will carry over

    I am afraid that I ll slip into drugs and I don't want to see my pare ts cry when they see me dead somewhere laying around.

    I am really scared and I bet that after I write this post I ll be looking for a game to play or to attempt to cover my issues.

    I am afraid to go upstairs because u can game there whenever I want and how much i want.

    Will that shit ever stop?

     

    I know how addiction works but I have never really practice what I know consistently to get away from porn and gaming.

     

  7. Day 5/90 Nogames

    Hello all!

    Gratitude 

    the sunlight 

    baking a cake

    being in charge and responsible for actions

     

    One advice I can give us once you are preparing yourself for success:

    1.Make a structure in weekdays for the weekends.

    That removes huge amount of starting issues in work or anything else you'd love to do.

    2. By Brian Tracy there is the principle I cannot clrecall its name but do the most difficult and the most important thing first.

    3. Do 3 or 4 things a day and give yourself a penny on your  imaginary account

    each day you did one thing the second day give yourself 2 pennies and so on 

    the point of it is that each day you do something is worth more than the day before.

    It helped me to push myself out of the thinking  "all days are the same".

    Emotions/feelings

    It is tough to do one thing that you don' like over the course of time.

    I am tired but I am happy that I feel the slight effect of the happy habits having on me!!!

    See ya!

    • Like 1
  8.  

    On 4.1.2018 at 11:34 PM, superiggy said:

    Hey dirkj3, good stuff! :D Keep it up!

    I've read The Slight Edge and I enjoyed it. :) 

    Books I'd recommend about short-long term gratification, the best I've read is The Willpower Instinct, by Kelly McGonigal. Without a doubt.

    Another great book on that subject (although not as awesome as the previously mentioned) is Switch, by Dan Heath.

    Thank you very much I ll give it a shot!

    Hello Gamequitters!

    It is almost a year now since I have joined this forum with Cam being my last hope to help me to introduce me to the website

    I have to admit I didnt come here very often(which I ll definitely change)

    I spend my last christmas week gaming I have stopped because I JUST SEE THE LOSS AVERSION AND OR SUNKEN COST FALLACY IN IT

    I have gamed through the nights like every 2 days..

    the insight for me has been the moment when I saw in my imagination my parents and my brother crying because i had gamed me to death

    It was just an image and after few minutes I HAD MY PHONE WITH THE GAME IN MY HANDS READY TO SINK ANOTHER NIGHT

    Then I was like: I wanna be happy so bad and I dont want to deal with the Gaming requirements to unlock certain things anymore

    I wanna be free from that(school will be starting soon)

    Since  two days  I have my phone in the common area which feels awesome

    I started the HAPPY HABITS for a little

    Today there was an exam and it was tough to be with the self critizising voice in my head

    Usually I dont hear it but today it was very stressful and I was resisting it....

    I have fapped yesterday but i had such an enormous dream experience!!!

     I have read 10 pages of the slight edge and i feel that it is working in me.!

     

     

    Gratitude list

    I was helping an elderly woman in the elderly home to open the door for her and to grab the papers she has dropped on the ground.

    I  love myself being mor energetic since I have a no porn streak of one week.

    I see the world in a more positive light than before.

     

    HOW DO I FEEL RIGHT KNOW?

    I am tired and I am tempted to game on the pc right know

     

     

     

    • Like 1
  9. On 28.11.2017 at 11:33 PM, Laney said:

    Well, it is an interesting thought that creeps up. What about gaming makes you want to go and play them right now?  I'll answer mine for you, maybe there will be some similarities;

    I want to play a game right now....because I want to relax and reward myself at the end of a long day....because I yearn for magic and story and amazing visuals....because of the positive feelings I recall from my childhood and the accomplishment I felt being able to figure out the puzzle or beat the boss....because I'm bored and have nothing better to do....

    Wait what? I have nothing better to do? Heeellll no, I have letters I want to write, rooms I need to organize, car I need to get an oil change for, hair I want to bleach and dye blue, flow flags I want to build and dye myself, copper mugs I need to polish to give away during the holidays, friends I want to visit and catch up with, hikes I want to go on, dances and events I want to go to, I just bought Google Play Music and need to organize and create my music library, I want to prepare food to last for the whole week, my laundry is beginning to pile up again.

    So many yummy things and possibilities to fill my time with! I think I'm okay with the reward of going to bed earlier or a 2 hour phone call with a new friend. Let's explore your brain more and this thought more to see if you this is something you think you could handle at this point in your journey. 

    For context I did the 90-day detox (well, 82 days...) and now I'm sober on mmo's but not rpg's. I still play games, basically is what I'm saying. But I touch them here and there, it's been 2 months and I haven't even noticed or cared so I'd say I'm in a healthy spot with rpg's being reintroduced. When I reintroduced MMO's I became immediately addicted again and played for hours the first night, the whole day on the weekends, then began neglecting my life once more. 

    thats awesome!!!!!

    I  feel the same way!

  10. On 28.11.2017 at 6:09 PM, Hitaru said:

    @Piotr Remember it's not games, but the reason why you play games. Temporary escape is ok, procrastination is not. Challenge and progress is ok, Idleness and wasting time in fake achievements is not. Socialization is ok, isolation is not.

     I cannot agree more!!

     

    • Like 1
  11. Hello Gamequitters!

    It´s me dirkj3 after quite awhile now.

    What books can I recommend you?

    The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson

    Do you know a book which deals about short and long term gratification?

    Thank you

    Gratitude list

    A  night of rest

    My mum having as a support

    relief that i dont have to hide yself and the possibiliry to speak more

     

    • Like 1
  12. Thank you for your awesome support 

    I have celebrated my streak of one week push ups a couple days ago.

    I have applying the slight edge for a couple days 

    Especially the three reasons why one does not follow daily activities has been a real eye-opener for me.

    Gratitude list 

    The first travel without gaming 

    Day 11 of push ups !!

    Travel to North Sea

    • Like 1
  13. On 12/19/2017 at 5:59 AM, indie_rok said:

    Day 1 - Why I play

    Under @WorkInProgress advice, I watched the video series videos.

    Cam asks about why you play.

    It took me a while to figure it about,but I think I have the answer.

    • To escape reality. Some times I need to an escape from my emotions (instead of dealing with them). Did I just had a fight with my girl friend? Its easier to play LoL. Am I feeling angry because I am procrastinating way to much? It is better to open Titan Fall.
    • Because it is easier to feel that you are doing something good. Wanna level up in LoL? Just play a few hours and you will ge this new item, this new character. Wanna get cool abs? Work your ass 6 months on the gym. Its harder. Way way harder.
    • Because I don't have anything better to do. It is OK to be bored. It is not OK to fulfill this time with activities where you don't learn nothing. I should be reading, or practicing my social skills, or climbing a damn mountain. Not playing Battlefront the whole freaking weekend.

    I still miss my girlfriend. But as @Some Yahoo  and @Mimetic suggested, I will became the best version of myself. I just need the time and patience with my self.

    Your responses have been amazing.

    Thank you for taking the time to read this.

    That's some real awesome insight!!

  14. Hello Gamequitters

    I have started yesterday my journey to finally break through the box that keeps me being miserable

    I found myself reinstalling another game on my phone i had deleted several times.

    It was 4am where i was so pissed about  restarting the game starting from scratch...

    I told myself that i am done with it .

    I wanna quit games and pmo no matter what

    I notice that i have a negative association to being productive.(Thank you Cam for putting that video out)

    I have written a pro and cons list about why i game and about the consequences.

    Now that there wont be any pro arguments for gaming other than the craving for dopamine surges... for example i have been to the christmas fair today

    If i would have been gaming i wouldnt be going outside.

     

    I can use dopamine to work for me and not against me.

    I have started to do 5 daily push ups just for consistency.

    I have 3 exams after the winter break.

      I have quitted at 4 am and as i got up i felt down and afer that i went to town to buy some christmas gifts and it felt weird

    But it is definitely easier to change myself because there is nothing that hinders me.

    I picked up typing and it feels great that i didnt forget everything!!

     

     Gratitude list

     

    buying christmas gifts and having a nice lunch in town

    • Like 1
  15. Today my teacher said that I shouldn't think and just do

    Gratitude list

    A good night of sleep I felt refreshed as I woke up at 6.30 in the morning.

    I didn't feel sp weak like yesterday

    I did some exam  prep for tomorrow  love the usual german lessons in which our teacher.is talking about the middle ages and myths that are out there

    It is very interesting.

     

  16. Thank you for your encouragement and help

    I am done with it I have been gaming for about 16 hours and slept for only about 3/4hour?

    Damn. I have a very difficult exam on Wednesday

     

     

    I watched a few of Cam's videos

  17. 9 hours ago, WorkInProgress said:

    That is exactly what I have done so many times. Escaping from stressful things and feeling shitty about it afterwards. It is hard to face the fact that yourself aren'T what you want to be. Not the one who is easily doing the things you want to do. It shouldn't be a surprise but somehow it feels bad everytime again and again.

    The thing is that this fear of failing is a root cause of procrastination. Seems illogical but it is still true. You'll need to look at these exams and challenges as a way to test your knowledge and to motivate you and not as a exam which evalulates your. It truly doesn't. It just evalulates your knowledge in a distinct topic. That has nothing to do with you beeing awesome or shitty. It is a chance to see where your knowledge needs to be improved and give you the chance to improve it. And be it only your studying habits. See the benefit in the challenge and don't be afraid. There is so much to gain and in reality very little to loose.

     

    Thank you for your encouragement and advice 

    I understand that fear of failing is there especially the vicious circle that I have been trapped for a long time

    The thing is how can I get stronger  to go through tough days?

    Today I have been having no strive and I felt good that I had my last exam this week.

    Sometimes it is desperation or today it was feeling good that causes me to binge on yt or porn.

    I have watched some procrastination videos and perfectionism but I don' know how to put this into practice.

    Sometimes I wanna throw a mountain I do several things that are productive but sometimes I give straight in 

    like ah there's a negative feeling or something I don't wanna deal with and bam another dose of dopamine I don't even try to face the difficulty sometimes hen I have a tough day.

    I cn do well on easy days but when there is a tough day I do the easy binging.

    I have relapsed today on binging and pmo and yt.

    I have never done something productive over a longer time.

    It was only those binge learning for tests and I am already working on that one but no pmo and quitting games..

    Also the root issue is that I look at one thing  one time and then never again and say yeah I can do no games but  as time goes on and I am feeling better I have forgotten what kind of consequences gaming has or pmo.

     

    Gratitude 

    I learn more about my root issues and have pushed through 3.5 days without games!

     

     

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