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kortheo

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  1. Day 234

    I've not been great at practicing what I preach when it comes to sleep lately. I keep telling myself it's a priority and then it gets away from me for one reason or another. In this case it was mostly just insomnia, and I tried my best, but still, it's frustrating to not be able to get rest.

    On the plus side I had a pretty spontaneous connection on OKC yesterday that led to a great date in the evening. So there's that! I'm starting to come to a point in my dating life where I'm feeling abundance; I don't feel nervous about the dating process as much because I'm having success, so I'm gaining confidence in that area.

    Despite my tiredness I've overall done a pretty good job of focusing on work today. I also have a family thing to deal with later; I need to have a talk with my sister. We've kept rescheduling it but tonight it's going to finally happen, which is nice. It will be good to get it out of the way.

    Feeling a little less overwhelmed, but both work and life have been pretty crazy lately. Someone told me at work today: "The reward for good work is more work." Which for me is a lived experience. I will keep trying to find balance.

    T

  2. I am not magically perfect just because I quit games and have been working on myself

    It's got to be said that perfection isn't easy of a goal.

    What comes to feeling overwhelmed focusing on the exact fundamentals you pointed out has been really helpful for me! Sometimes it's just down to a good rest, friends and exercise. 

    Keep it up Travis! :) 

    Definitely. I was going to say that perfection isn't my goal, but I guess it actually probably was unconsciously based upon how I worded that. Good point that we shouldn't always feel that we need to be perfect.

  3. Day 233

    I am not magically perfect just because I quit games and have been working on myself, and I need to make sure I remember this and prevent myself from slacking off. No matter how much we grow there will always be new challenges to overcome, and at no point can we stop doing the good habits that drive our health and our new lives after gaming. I have been journaling on my own, but I would benefit from continuing to journal here. Cam pointed out to me that not journaling here daily has prevented me from processing everything that has been happening in my life, and he is totally right. So it's time to recommit to this.

    The fundamentals never stop being important, but I find as I go along that I experience them in different ways. When you first start working on having healthy habits, they're hard. It takes a lot of work to establish them. But as you commit to them eventually they become second nature and you can do them on autopilot. It's really cool when this happens. It means that your capacity for being who you want to be increases. When you start first it takes all your energy to do habit A (say exercising) but after a few months you can do A without nearly as much effort, and then you can add habit B (say eating healthy), so suddenly instead of having no healthy habits you have the capacity for A and B at the same time. It's like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes.

    I realize that there are a ton of people on this forum who are still struggling to quit gaming, and I realize I don't talk about gaming much anymore at all here, because the truth is that I just don't think about games anymore. That chapter of my life has closed. But I hope people can realize that it was never really the games that brought you here - it's the self-improvement. And that's all I write about here, really.

    I've been feeling pretty overwhelmed lately to be honest. I've taken on a lot of stuff in my life, much of which I didn't know if I could handle or not. I'm handling it, but it's wearing me out, so it's time to adjust. I have to drop some things, recommit to others, and keep steady with some. Ultimately I have to double down on what's working so that I get all the benefit. Doubling down on: BJJ, journaling, meditation, taking time for myself, sleep. Keeping steady with social commitments, dating, Meetup, family, work. Letting go of smaller things, like reading or keeping up with media, which was never much of a priority for me anyway, and letting go of some relationships that were just draining me but not giving me anything in return.

    To anyone just starting out on a 90 day detox, realize that it's really just the beginning, the first chapter. Working on yourself in this way is the project of a lifetime, not a temporary thing.

  4. Hey Sebastian, a warm welcome to the forum. I can relate to basically everything that you're saying here in your post. I myself began gamequitters right as I was going through a breakup, and I know it's tough. But now is a great time to commit to this and take some time to improve your life. If you give it a shot, results will come faster than you expect.

    I have four recommendations if you want to get setup in the best way possible:

    1. Commit to the 90 day detox. Really, there's just no other way.
    2. Read Respawn. It's a great guide that will get you setup right to quit gaming.
    3. Create a journal in the forum and post as often as you can, daily is best IMO. This will help you keep your thoughts clear and also document your progress over time.
    4. Start reading books on self-improvement - start with The Slight Edge first, it is foundational for everything else.

    Best of luck, if you have any questions feel free to message me.

  5. [...]

    This is a much needed reminder for me, Kortheo.  Sleep, eating well, exercise, meditation, and journaling.  Currently, my sleeping pattern has improved, but not without all the other main elements such as the exercise, healthy eating, and meditation.  Yet, sleep has the strongest effect on all of these components, interestingly.  If I have lack of sleep, everything else is affected.  There was a study that mentioned that chronic lack of sleep actually increases our cortisol levels, the stress hormone, which then causes us to crave more carbohydrates, then we eat more, gain weight, feel less energy to exercise.  So, I often wonder if sleep is the underlying vehicle that truly helps us regulate our lives? 

    Just a little food for thought!  You're really awesome, btw!  I have heard your first Podcast and am looking forward to hearing others in the future.  Thanks for being an inspiration on this forum!  :)

    Haha thank you for saying so. Thanks for reading, I hope I can continue to offer thoughts that others find valuable.

     

    Day 229

    So I'm about to go on another date. Before I go on dates, I take a moment to reflect on how I want to show up to the date to increase the chances of it going well, and to get the most out of it. I've spent a decent amount of time learning and thinking about this, but now I'm getting opportunities to apply it and practice it and learn, which is great! 

    I think I can lay out some basic mindsets/principles that are appropriate in basically every case. I think you'll find that these will also apply to basically any time you're meeting someone new, or someone that you don't know all that well yet, not just in dating.

    1. Make having fun the goal. Even if you don't end up seeing the person again, if you aim to have fun, you won't be wasting your time. If you succeed in having fun, they will probably be having fun too, and then you have added value to their life because they got to spend time with a fun person. Obviously, this is attractive, too. This will also mean you're practicing your ability to have fun with people, which is a great skill in life. You may discover that having fun is easier than you thought, and this is a much harder goal to fail at than, say, getting another date or something. It can really take the pressure off of the situation.
    2. Learn something interesting about them. If you make this one of your goals, you'll be coming from a place of being interested in them, of curiosity, and wanting to discover things about them. This feels good to the other person, because people like when others are interested in them. But it's not meant to be manipulative or artificial - everyone has interesting things about them, and you both genuinely benefit from learning about each other in this situation. 
    3. Be an active listener; be present with them in the moment. Give the person you're with your full attention. It's easy for our minds (or eyes) to wander, or for us to get caught up in thinking about what we want to say next once they've finished talking, because we want to display our impressive selves to them; we want them to like us by how we come off. But if you're showing up this way, you can accidentally start to ignore what they're actually saying, because you're so caught up in what you're doing. If you stay present with them and what they're saying, and take the time to absorb it and think about it, and remember the details, they'll felt more heard, seen, understood, valued, appreciated, etc - which in the end is going to lead to more connection and attraction than the alternative.
    4. Try to understand their perspective. Basically, this is practicing empathy in a simple, everyday way. This basically requires that you do 3 effectively, but it's more than that. It can be hard to understand where people are coming from sometimes, especially if you don't know them well, or if you don't have must practice doing it. As you learn about them, if you can take a moment to piece together the information they provide you about themselves and get a sense of what their hopes, fears, dreams, concerns, irritations, joys, etc in life are you'll be in a much better position to not only understand them, but again, connect with them in a meaningful way. What you're doing is answering the question: what does this person care about, what matters to this person? And how can I use that to make this interaction better?

    With that, I'm off. Have a good week everyone.

  6. This is a wonderful thread, Travis.  I like how you emphasized 'mindfulness' of one's body, one's sleep schedule, and one's energy.  It really helps others to identify underlying reasons why they might be falling back on maintaining good habits.  Thanks so much for adding this!

    I apologize if I am hijacking your thread, but I really feel a need to post this additional thought. 

    I suspect that there are people who game and also cope with mental illness.  I also think this can occur after a person immediately quits gaming.  This makes sense to me, as when the dopamine supply from gaming is suddenly eliminated, the brain goes into a type of 'starvation' mode, and ultimately a person's energy is sapped, or their optimism declines.  Their sleep is longer.  They have increased irritability.  Their relationships break down.  They want to isolate.  They can't even think of starting a goal, or keeping up with their goals.  Everything shuts down mentally.

    A person with depression may have difficulty starting or continuing with goals, because often there is a lack of vitality, or anhedonia. 

    Cam, if you're reading this, I am not sure if you created a video at all about potential symptoms of depression as a result of Detox?  I haven't perused all of your videos yet, but I think that it's worth looking into, and posting a video about it as well.  I think there may be an uncaptured demographic of gamers who also cope with mental illness, and that if they are reminded about coping skills, or links to medical websites, or just recognizing these symptoms, I believe that it would help people sustain their goal-setting, or realize that the stumbling block towards life fulfillment is actually an underlying depression affecting their ability to move forward.

    Here is a link to one of my favourite TEDtalks and also a favorite writer:  Andrew Solomon.  I hope this helps anyone here who also copes with depression and anxiety. 

    https://www.ted.com/talks/andrew_solomon_depression_the_secret_we_share?language=en

    Sincerely,

    Dann

    P.S.  As a long-time advocate for people with mental illness, I hope we all remove the stigma associated with it too.  :)  A person who is suffering from mental illness is not a weak human being who lacks willpower, but is somebody who needs increased supports and therapy to help them restore their vitality for life once again.  Peace, everyone!

    Hey, no problem, thanks for the post! Discussions of mental illness in the context of gaming is something probably needs more time devoted to it. Indeed, an addiction is a mental health condition. I have struggled with both anxiety and depression in the past and I'm certain that my gaming was interconnected with it. And after you cut out gaming from your life, as you say, you're going to deal with withdrawals and feel fairly depressed.

  7. Day 227

    This week I'm focusing on getting back to basics. Once we start doing well, and get into an upward spiral, we feel that things are going really well so we lose the feeling that we need to continue pushing ourselves to do the things that got us there in the first place. We feel like we've earned the right to stop working for a bit and just enjoy the life we've created for ourselves.

    This is well and good, and it's normal for habits to fluctuate; we are not robots that can perfectly execute habits like clockwork every day under every circumstance and mental state. Rather, you need to choose habits that are sustainable for you over the long run. And we certainly want to take time to enjoy our lives when they are going well. But, we shouldn't allow ourselves to slack off or to let our standards for ourselves to be violated. We need to keep up with the foundational behaviors that created all that goodness in the first place.

    At the most fundamental for me, this includes good sleep habits, eating well, exercise, meditation, and journaling. If you commit to doing these every day, you'll have a solid foundation to build on. You'll feel healthy and fresh and ready to take on the day, and it will keep your mind clear and your anxieties at bay. It's from this state that you can tackle challenges at work and pursue activities in life that you find fulfilling, that allow you to live your potential.

    It's important to be operating from this foundation, because if you lose it, you start to be a little less ambitious. As an example, if I didn't sleep well, suddenly going to Jiu Jitsu after work doesn't seem so appealing, because I'd rather nap. And if I don't go to Jiu Jitsu, then I don't improve, I miss out on social interaction, I don't gain a boost to my confidence from learning a new self-defense technique, and I don't feel as good about myself overall. It feels like a missed opportunity.

    Sometimes we get thrown off balance by something that is legitimate. For example, maybe in order to socialize and have fun and connect with others, we go to a party and stay out late, and this throws off our sleep cycle. That's OK - there are tradeoffs in life, and having an active social life is maybe worth giving up that sleep. The key is to be aware of it and to minimize how that affects you. When I don't sleep well, I often find my appetite gets weird and suddenly I don't eat well either, and maybe if I went to a party I was drinking. Suddenly the next day you're tired, hungover, and feeling weak because you're not eating well. Not a great thing, and this can cascade in throwing off habits for a few days. Suddenly I'm not exercising or meditating or journaling because I don't have the energy or the willpower. Instead of going through this, do your best to get back on track right away - force yourself to eat healthy food, catch up on sleep as soon as possible. Also, think ahead - be mindful of how late you're staying out and if you're drinking, be mindful of how much, so that to minimize any negative future effects. You can thread the needle and do the things you want to do while also optimizing your healthy habits.

    Stability and consistency are important. They allow us to be our best selves.

  8. Day 222

    I've had an interesting couple of weeks. More dating thoughts.

    • Sometimes your relationship in person and via texting can be radically different, or at least feel that way. People have different texting styles and it's easy to misinterpret things, especially when you don't know the person all that well.
    • Sometimes people can be interested in you, but simply have higher priorities in their life. You kind of have to meet the person where they're at. If you prioritize them higher than they're prioritizing you, it's not going to go so well, and you're probably not going to feel great about it. I guess the bright side is that if things go well, your priority in their life can / probably will increase. Obviously people don't get invested right away (well, some do - I'm guilty of this - but it's not really healthy in most cases).
    • You definitely have to be consistent and open to new things, and not get too hooked one one person, as I said in a previous post. Easier said than done but I'm learning.
    • This morning in my 5 Minute Journal I saw this quote - "A Smooth Sea Never Made a Skillful Sailor". That really resonated. If something is hard, you will learn and grow from it - fair enough. To the extent that I am challenged in various emotional ways by dating, I am growing because of them and better able to handle these rough waters. I guess I usually associated this kind of notion with physical or intellectual skills, but now I'm realizing that it's perhaps doubly true for emotional intelligence and emotional resilience.
    • I often try to control uncomfortable situations by researching the living hell out of them. If knowledge is power, I unconsciously reason, then tons of knowledge is tons of power, and hence control. I'll google everything that comes to mind and try to figure out how to know everything about dating (or whatever the challenging thing is) so that I can master it and control it and not have to deal with all that uncomfortable uncertainty. But in this case, that's not actually possible. There is no internet article I can read that will tell me how to ensure the outcome I want from this life situation. In fact, there is probably no action I can take to accelerate the process to get what I want. The only thing I can do is wait until the time is right, and then have further experiences, which will give me more information to act on. And things just have to go at the pace they go at. You cannot force a process that takes time. You can't hack getting to know someone (actually you probably can make it more efficient, but ultimately, people take time to get to know, and it's a messy and complicated process at times).
    • With the above point in mind, the hardest, and yet most important thing for me to do right now is just sit and wait and chill. Sit with the feelings of discomfort I have and learn to be okay with them, instead of trying to escape them. Escaping them doesn't lead to any growth.
    • The fact that dating can be anxiety provoking means is a sign that it actually matters to me, that I care about what I'm doing and the people that I'm trying to connect with, and that there are real stakes here. It means I'm engaged with life in a real way. Which while appropriately scary in some ways, is ultimately a good sign - what I'm doing actually matters.

    I hope everyone is having a great week!

    Those are some really insightful thoughts about dating - the one that particularly resonates with me is bullet pt. 5. For the longest time I would do the same exact thing - Google, read, ask other people, etc. At the end of the day, like you said, it is impossible to figure someone out other than by interacting with them, and discovering who they are as a person. 

    It would be awesome if you could figure out who was a sociopath, crazy, likely to cheat, right away -- there may be signs that can help you, but you'll never know for sure unless you try. And of course, there's the problem that people change over time (though some things stay the same). 

    Life is messy :S

    Totally. And another point I would add to my original point there is that even if you do everything "right" on your end - you present your best self on dates, you don't make any awkward mistakes, you maybe even impress them, make them laugh, connect with them - there's still no way to guarantee that they'll like you and want to keep going out with them. Even if they do like you, they might have extenuating circumstances or something that come up and you may not see them again. Ultimately the thing that you can't control in the situation is the other person's thoughts, feelings, and actions. All you can do is show up in the best way you can, and see where it goes. You have to accept your lack of control.

  9. Day 222

    I've had an interesting couple of weeks. More dating thoughts.

    • Sometimes your relationship in person and via texting can be radically different, or at least feel that way. People have different texting styles and it's easy to misinterpret things, especially when you don't know the person all that well.
    • Sometimes people can be interested in you, but simply have higher priorities in their life. You kind of have to meet the person where they're at. If you prioritize them higher than they're prioritizing you, it's not going to go so well, and you're probably not going to feel great about it. I guess the bright side is that if things go well, your priority in their life can / probably will increase. Obviously people don't get invested right away (well, some do - I'm guilty of this - but it's not really healthy in most cases).
    • You definitely have to be consistent and open to new things, and not get too hooked one one person, as I said in a previous post. Easier said than done but I'm learning.
    • This morning in my 5 Minute Journal I saw this quote - "A Smooth Sea Never Made a Skillful Sailor". That really resonated. If something is hard, you will learn and grow from it - fair enough. To the extent that I am challenged in various emotional ways by dating, I am growing because of them and better able to handle these rough waters. I guess I usually associated this kind of notion with physical or intellectual skills, but now I'm realizing that it's perhaps doubly true for emotional intelligence and emotional resilience.
    • I often try to control uncomfortable situations by researching the living hell out of them. If knowledge is power, I unconsciously reason, then tons of knowledge is tons of power, and hence control. I'll google everything that comes to mind and try to figure out how to know everything about dating (or whatever the challenging thing is) so that I can master it and control it and not have to deal with all that uncomfortable uncertainty. But in this case, that's not actually possible. There is no internet article I can read that will tell me how to ensure the outcome I want from this life situation. In fact, there is probably no action I can take to accelerate the process to get what I want. The only thing I can do is wait until the time is right, and then have further experiences, which will give me more information to act on. And things just have to go at the pace they go at. You cannot force a process that takes time. You can't hack getting to know someone (actually you probably can make it more efficient, but ultimately, people take time to get to know, and it's a messy and complicated process at times).
    • With the above point in mind, the hardest, and yet most important thing for me to do right now is just sit and wait and chill. Sit with the feelings of discomfort I have and learn to be okay with them, instead of trying to escape them. Escaping them doesn't lead to any growth.
    • The fact that dating can be anxiety provoking means is a sign that it actually matters to me, that I care about what I'm doing and the people that I'm trying to connect with, and that there are real stakes here. It means I'm engaged with life in a real way. Which while appropriately scary in some ways, is ultimately a good sign - what I'm doing actually matters.

    I hope everyone is having a great week!

  10. Day 216 - I made a podcast!

    I've been thinking about making a podcast for a while now. I love podcasts and generally like to think out loud, so I've been itching to start putting something together.

    Topics that I plan on covering include self-improvement, general observations about life, probably science and philosophy, and whatever happens to be on my mind. It's mostly an experiment for myself, but I thought I would share it here, too.

    https://soundcloud.com/travis-kirk-992919435/episode-0-resistance-and-growth

     I hope everyone had a good week. Here's to the weekend!

    Travis

  11. Day 216

    Today I come thinking about attachment.

    I've been struggling with being attached to things recently. I'm starting to date again, and one of my weaknesses is getting carried away with things. I get ahead of myself. If a date goes well, I will imagine/expect my relationship with that person to continue to go well into the future, and for things to always go to plan. This causes me to be attached to an idea of how things should be.

    But reality doesn't work this way, least of all in dating. Things frequently change course in ways that you cannot predict or control. This is the same with life generally of course, but it feels magnified in dating. It seems important to focus only on what you can control and let go of what you cannot. You cannot make people behave a certain way or do certain things. Nor should you want to, really.

    Attachment is to be distinguished from desire. It is healthy and good to want or desire things - but attachment is what gets us in trouble. In this case, it is healthy to want to date people or have a relationship, but being attached to requiring a specific person to be happy (attachment) can be a recipe for unhappiness because that is not something that it's in your control to guarantee. You can be reasonably confident that if you put in your best effort that you will find someone to connect with and be happy with, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea to get caught up on one person, or even caught up on expecting one scheduled date to happen when things come up and plans can change.

    So, I'm working on being less attached to specific outcomes, going with the flow, and putting my best foot forward.

    I'm 216 days gaming free, and it feels fantastic. Keep going everyone.

  12. Awesome, welcome to the forum. Deleting Steam/your games library is certainly challenging emotionally. When I hit my 90-day mark, I used this method and never looked back :D. Wasn't easy, but was worth it.

  13. Welcome to the forums. Definitely stay engaged with the community here and post daily. Journaling here daily will help you clarify your thinking and emotions, both of which can be jumbled when you decide to quit.  Also, Respawn is a great guide that may help you in the beginning stages. 

  14. Welcome. It's incredible once you start to realize how video games affect you and use up your time. I've been game-free for about 7 months and I have no desire to play them anymore because I spend all of my time working on things that make my life better and bring me closer to my goals. Video games just don't seem remotely worth the time spent on them anymore. Best of luck on your journey!

  15. It's certainly possible. My understanding is that ADHD has a lot to do with dopamine regulation, and video games can provide a strong hit of dopamine that might be more potent to someone with ADHD.

    @Laney might have something to add. She's written about her ADHD in her journal too, so you could look at that.

  16. For some reason I can't find the meaningfulness from my life at the moment. Anyone been through similar processes?

    Yeah, I've definitely been in that place before. It is in some ways a question I'm currently exploring as well. What are my goals? What do I want to do in my life, and why? What makes me feel fulfilled and satisfied?

     Figuring out what makes you feel fulfilled or what has meaning for you is partially a matter of being mindful of your experiences and a matter of trying new things. Is there something you've felt for a long time you wanted to do but never done? Maybe you're not even really sure why you want to do it, but you just do. Well, go ahead and just do it. Try it and see how you feel. If you feel good about it, satisfied, keep doing it.

    There are a few other ways to get at this. I think for me it's thinking about people I admire - what are they doing that I'm not? If you did those things you might start to feel satisfied and respect and admire yourself.

    Another one is thinking about what you wish you could do, but don't feel good enough for, or you feel afraid of trying. Frequently the areas we are most hesitant to explore are the ones that will be most rewarding for us. Programming is such a thing for me. I've always kind of wanted to learn programming, but never have, even though I really respect programmers and find it to be an impressive skill. Recently I've realized the only reason I haven't learned it is because I was afraid of it, afraid I wasn't good/smart enough, that I didn't deserve to have a career I was fully proud of and satisfied with, etc. Sometimes you have to get past those mindsets and just do the thing and you'll start feeling a lot more meaning in your life. I've been learning scripting lately (which is basically programming) and I find it very satisfying as my skills grow.

    Also remember that you don't need to fully accomplish your goals to be fulfilled. As long as you are putting your best effort to make progress towards them, you will feel good about yourself.

    Maybe I didn't answer your question directly, but I hope you find this helpful.

    Best,

    Travis

  17. I don't think there's anything bad about reading the lore books if you don't find they are causing you to want to play.

    I feel like throwing in my two cents on this one.

    I agree that reading lore books is probably not that big of an issue. But in my case, I opted not to. I had a couple RPG-related lore books and chose to get rid of them when I quit gaming. I think when you quit it's best to fully close that chapter of your life and move on. If you keep reading gaming-related books, you keep yourself connected to those times in the past when you were gaming. You have reminders. It's kind of like keeping mementos or pictures of an ex that maybe you shouldn't be, or something along those lines. It's easier to move on from a break up when you don't have reminders sitting around everywhere.

    Plus, specifically in this case, if you like fantasy books (I do) there are a ton of great, probably better written fantasy novels out there that you can dive into. Think of it as a way to scratch the same itch while also connecting to a new niche. You can check our r/fantasy or r/books and find people you can connect with over fantasy books without needing it to be connected to gaming.

    Anyway, just my thoughts.

  18. A more specific example... well, I think I first noticed it with movies and music, which isn't quite 'real life' but still less overly stimulating than video games. Music has always affected me strongly, but in games certain music, like boss music, would make me so excited/anxious/nervous about whether I would be able to win or not. But now there is certain epic music that will give me those same feelings but just in the context of my regular life when I feel like I'm doing awesome things or stepping up to challenges. Before, when gaming, music didn't hold my attention much; now I love listening to it again. Movies also didn't used to hold my attention much but now it's like I can appreciate them in a new way and notice all of the different elements of real life that are reflected in them and represented in them.

    Getting away from media though, take the issue of a sense of progress of acquiring skills. That was a huge part of what I loved about video games, specifically RPGs. I didn't have much of a sense of that in my real life before. Now I have the satisfaction of improving both my work skills and my BJJ skills... and it feels great. It's great to see yourself improving in some way that actually matters and to have that satisfaction.

    So, I guess there were feelings I used to have in video games that I now have in real life, basically.

  19. Day 200

    I may have gotten off on my day count recently, so I just rechecked it. Day 200! Wow. Time for a post.

    Here's what I'm thinking about this week:

    1. Trust yourself. One lesson I learned this week from Cam is that we are all responsible for our own emotions. On paper, this is obvious. In practice, it's easy not to live your life that way. For me, I find that there are certain situations that I fear because of how I might feel in them, so I avoid them. But, I'm now realizing that fear may be misplaced - if I am responsible for and in control of my own emotions, then no one can make me feel out of control. I can do what I need to do to be in control and decide what I'm going to do in a given situation. If, in an extreme situation, I felt unsafe or something, I can choose to remove myself from that situation. The situation doesn't control me. If you have this mindset, it's a lot easier to trust yourself because you'll be able to handle whatever life throws at you.
    2. Emotional depth. I'm beginning to notice that there is emotional depth to life that I used to only experience in video games. Now, I feel it in real life. It's really cool - I think this is a side-effect of games being hyper-stimulating, and the rest of life feeling flat and dull as a result. Hard to describe, but maybe some of you know what I mean?
    3. Going after what you really want. I've realized recently that for most of my life I've sold myself short. I would go after the second or third best thing because I didn't think that I was good enough for the best, or not smart enough, or whatever. Not the objectively best thing, but best in the sense that it's the thing that I would find most fulfilling. Dig deep, find out what you really want in life (be honest with yourself), and go after it. If we don't do this I think we're in for a life full of nebulous dissatisfaction.

    That's all for now.

    T.

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