Schwing

Detox day: 63 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 0 Woke up at: 12:10 Thoughts and Feelings: Low productivity today. Got up late.Watched a movieTried to do a bit of maths homeworkRelapsed on the nofap. Just got to get back upTook a cold shower. It's quite bearable up until a point where I feel like my skin is going to freeze off.Tasks and Achievements: 50 pushupsCold showerWhat I am grateful for: MetalRoast dinnerCold showersWhat I have learnt from today: Keep going with no fap till the bitter end. I wont find peace of mind until I do.No pornographic content at allAbout tomorrow: Get up at 6:30Do project workStudyingRunning

So I haven't posted in some time because I forgot to post two days in a row, pulled another all nighter and then fell asleep for 20 hours the next day. I have been back at school these past few days and I have had an all time low in my depression. I relapsed on my no fap today and I'm starting again. I will make a rule to not view any porn at all even if I don't wank. If I do then that counts as relapse. But I hit 12 days which is my record. My productivity has dropped a lot and I couldn't get anything done today.

No post yesterday because I pulled an all nighter to finish studying. I got 4 hours sleep and I haven't felt tired at all since. I also got a new haircut which is great. Detox day: 58 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 7 Woke up at: 7:25 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up early enoughDamn my testosterone levels must have peaked. Really deep voice, confident, witty. All kinds of shit.Something was very different today. Usually guys my age tend to be pretty insecure about their ego and think it's essential for social prowess. But, today everybody was super chill this morning and didn't put each other down. Seems like everyone is growing up. I have noticed that lately.So I started getting seriously bad fapping cravings today and I had to get down and do 50 but that didn't cut it. I ended up looking at a little bit of porn but I didn't wank over the shit at all. I feel a lot more stable now.Looked up some stuff on cold showers. I will take them now.Tasks and Achievements: 5 minutes meditation50 pushupsOvercame the urge to jerk itProjectHomeworkWhat I am grateful for: MetalOvercoming the urge to jerk itGreat day at schoolShort hairWhat I have learnt from today: Keep going with no fap till the bitter end. I wont find peace of mind until I do.Cold showers sound goodAbout tomorrow: Get up at 7Do project workStudyingRunning

That automatically makes you better than my father. It's quite ironic as the reason I am here at gamequitters is because of my escapist father and the effect that had on me. So, you have to do this for your kids otherwise they will end up like me. I know you can do it. Welcome to the community and best of luck with your family.

Detox day: 56 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 5 Woke up at: 8 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up very early. I have been using the kanban flow thing wip recommended. I got 7 pommodros today.So I have been studying all day everyday for the past few days. Fucking stressfully.Sometimes I take to the internet and research certain things like the Holocaust, climate change and conspiracy theories. Usually I end up with a load of contradicting evidence which has put me off this red pill crap. I find myself not red pilled to the point at which I am wearing a tin foil hat but at which I am skeptical of everything which is nice. Today's subjects were climate change and shit hits the fan survival preppers. As of now I believe climate change is real and caused by us but there is a lot of bullshit floating about like the so called consensus that 97℅ of scientists agree. I think preppers are often rational people. Too many people in today's society are weak and too dependent on the government who don't actually give a shit about them. I think people should be a little self sufficient and learn the ways of the land so I will do that. My purpose is to be the best version of myself so I will embrace a country lifestyle- I live in it after all. That doesn't mean I'm running around in the forest from now on forever. I will still embrace modern technology and lifestyle but I want to be a little more independent.Tasks and Achievements: 5 minutes meditationProjectResearchWhat I am grateful for: MetalBeing smart. I would have been in a very bad state if I wasn't as intelligent as I am now and took initiative.What I have learnt from today: Don't leave work till last minute Preppers aren't nutjobs. At least the ones that don't own a treasure trove of supermarket brand canned beans.About tomorrow: Get up at 8Do project workStudying

Didn't post the other day because I was back late from work.

Detox day: 55 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 4 Woke up at: 12:00 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up late again but I was productive today.I studied all fucking day. I am quite stressed because I am back at school on tuesdayMy stepdad saw my muscles the other day (no homo) and he says that it looks like I've been working out for 4 years. Except I have only been doing 100 pushups a day very sporadically for 6 months. Must be down to my genetics.Checked out some metal gigs. Why are all the best ones in fucking manchester or on a school night?!!! And why do I live in the middle of nowhere?!!Tasks and Achievements: 15 minutes meditationProjectMetal gigsMaths homeworkWhat I am grateful for: MetalHaving awesome genetics for massive pecks and arms.Roast dinner. My mum is awesome at cookingDeath metal. Helps me concentrate when studying.What I have learnt from today: I have come to the conclusion that mental gains are my main concern and I want to maximise my productivity and train my concentration. I will mediate more often instead of pushups.I am getting more able at controlling my fapping urges. Saying goodbye to degeneracy!About tomorrow: Get up at 8Do project workStudying

Hi @kingstravy You said you are not as passionate about programming as before. I feel the same way about art- one of my passions. But looking into my past, my desire to pursue certain hobbies has shifted very sporadically. Some days I think "I AM GOING TO BE THE BEST DRUMMER EVER!!!" and other days I think "I WILL BE THE BEST CLIMBER EVER!!!". I have decided I will pick a certain skillset and do my best in it and never be phased by any feeling to stop. I think there is more meaning in this than being propelled by fanciful instances of whim only to fall back down. Make sure you keep track of your hobbies and that you are measuring them. I have made this mistake and I am only just learning from it now.

Hi @thomas I think temporary escape is good in small doses because it helps us relax and maintain balance in our lives. If you are playing videogames to achieve this I don't think this is a good idea as they can suck you in and return you to your old habits. I read a lot of fantasy novels and I also do a bit of art. Although I wont get to play the Witcher 3 anymore I can read the books. I encourage you to do something similar to help you relax but not lose control again. But if you can play in moderation please tell me how because I really want to play the blood and wine expansion.

And I reset the nofap because I did fap 2 days ago.

Detox day: 53 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 2 Woke up at: 12:00 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up late again but I was productive today.I did a lot of studying and I can move on to another section now. Studying is my main focus atm as I am back at school next week on TuesdayI have some pretty nice muscles Mostly upper body. Push-ups paid off.I looked into the air cadet leadership course I am considering doing. It sounded really really tough but I think I am up to it.I emailed my scholarship sponsor an update on how I am getting on. I hope I can get an internship in April.So I sometimes break off from studying and I watch some YouTube or look at articles. It is always something productive though that furthers my knowledge but I would prefer to be more focused.Tasks and Achievements: 100 push-upsProjectLeadership courseEmailWhat I am grateful for: MetalMy sponsor and my scholarship in general. It feels good when people recognise my potential.What I have learnt from today: Climbing isn't all that time consuming. I can still do it as a hobby. Shame about drumming though.About tomorrow: Get up at 9Do project workArt art art art

Welcome. You will find a lot of good support and guidance here for whatever your situation is. Gamequitters is a special place and as long as you put effort in you will definitely accomplish a lot. Best of luck to you on your journey.

@hycniejsy Much of this makes sense. I do not have any need for masturbation aside from to stave off the inconvenience of spaffing all over my sheets. I have also found that my social skills have improved quite a bit since I stopped. Thank you for your input.

Thanks @WorkInProgress I am interested in mechatronic or electrical engineering degrees. As for industries I want to go into I want to keep my options open but robotics is something that greatly appeals to me.

Detox day: 52 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 10 Woke up at: 8:00 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up nice and early and followed my routineGot plenty of shit done today. Did a lot of studyingI watched a movie (watership down)I am posting late because I have taken a lot of time to think about who I am and what I want to do with my life. I found that I am a very mental person (hobby wise). Not so much physical. So far my hobbies are. Metal/ collecting music, drumming, art, reading learning german, climbing and I think I shall also mention studying for a career in engineering. I think I have too many hobbies to try and succeed in all of them. So I have narrowed down my most sincere passions: Art, metal/ collecting CDs, reading and learning german and most of all studying. I figure I can just go for a run every now and again to get me in the fresh air and doing exercise.Also. For cam's new year's word: mine is stability. I want to feel at peace and have a clear vision. Know my limitations work with them and maximise my potential.Tasks and Achievements: 100 push-upsProjectLooked at metal gigs and festivalsDrummingWhat I am grateful for: MetalLocal underground bands. Very rewarding when you find hidden gems.What I have learnt from today: Hobbies. Art or drumming. I must choose. I choose art. But I won't decide so quickly so I will make it my goal for those month to focus on art and see how I find it.My word for the year: stabilityAbout tomorrow: Get up at 9Do project workArt art art art

Detox day: 51 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 9 Woke up at: 11:00 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up late but earlierI did a lot of work today. One whole page of sketches and some CAD workSo today I was a bit doubtful on my no fap. I have come to the conclusion that masturbation is not harmful but porn is. Quitting masturbation in the past for extended periods of time has caused me to 'rubber band' back and watch porn. So I will make a compromise and simply cut down on masturbation. I just want to not watch porn. I did end up jerking it today but I wasn't acting upon any urge and I didn't even use my imagination.Tasks and Achievements: 100 push-upsProjectLooked through some engineering stuff.What I am grateful for: MetalPost rockThe awesome advice from the community Free internet research. It's really awesome how information is so accessible.What I have learnt from today: As aforementioned about nofap. The counter is now just for porn use.About tomorrow: Get up at 9I still need to look into going down to my local climbing centreDo project work

Ok just the studies for prostate cancer stated between 33-6% but you are right they did not take diet into account. I have gone without masturbation for a week before and then rubberbanded back to porn though so I think I will go easy on myself.

@Fagus Thanks for the advice. I have been reading up on sexual transmutation and one of the steps is not masturbating. So I think I'll focus on harnessing my libido. Every time I feel like jerking it I do something productive instead and then I wank later.

Ok I'll switch things up then. My no fap counter is now just for porn.

If you can't share things with your mother you can always share them with someone else. If she puts you down again you can try being more assertive and saying "No this is what I want to do". What do you play on guitar?

@Zeliow Nice. If want vocals check out the band This Town Needs Guns. I have been getting into a lot of post-hardcore bands lately like Hail The Sun and A Lot Like Birds.

So as some of you may know I started nofap recently and I'm about 8 days in. No my balls haven't exploded or anything, I just don't know if this is necessary. To put you guys in context, I was an excessive porn user and frequently got off to degenerate content. I am fully convinced that porn is fucking cancer and I'm not touching that shit again. But, I am also sceptical towards masturbation without porn because I think I might lose control again. And yet again, I don't want to have a wet dream every month and spaff all over my sheets. I have also looked into research suggesting infrequent ejaculation makes you 33% more likely to develop prostate cancer and I don't want that shit. Should I go through with the 30 day no wanking to detox or should I feel free to bust a nut every now and again and if I return to my old habits I should stop? I would appreciate it if any of you guys who have done nofap would give me some advice.

Detox day: 50 NoFap day ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ): 8 Woke up at: 12:15 Thoughts and Feelings: Got up very late again. O_ODid some studying. My project is well almost done.Talked a bit with a steam friend. He is from Sweden, Gothenburg which is the home of some of my favourite bandsTasks and Achievements: 100 push-upsProjectWhat I am grateful for: MetalWhatever this isMy friend for taking the time to talk to me. I think I take this for granted.What I have learnt from today: I could do with a little more structure as to how I approach my studies. I have been trying to focus solely on studying for now but I often drift off into browsing the internet.About tomorrow: Get up at 9I still need to look into going down to my local climbing centreDo project work

Hi robin I noticed you haven't posted in a while. Is everything ok?

So looking back on my journal. My attitude seems to have changed a lot over this month. I feel more chill and mature which is weird because it's only been a month.