Tatu92

Day 34 (I think I miscounted somewhere along the way, but I'm actually on day 34). What I'm grateful for: my siblings for being very kind and caringmy parents raising us and providingmy carunlimited internet___________________________________________________________ The last few days I've been feeling like a lot of the disciplines I've been doing have been more of a "drag" than serving me. So I took the time the last few days to stop and reflect. I was thinking a lot about what I really wanted to do and wrote it out. One thing I'm working on is improving/deepening my relationship with my parents. I've been irritable and pushing them away for a long time. I never thought of them as "friends" and would always feel like I never had time for them. When they ask "hows your day" I say "fine" with the subcommunication of telling them to leave me alone. Granted I've had times when I was vulnerable with them and close, but those were moments. And those moments were far and few in between, it is much more common to see me doing my own thing at home. I'll try speaking to my dad tonight, and see how it goes. I'll report tomorrow. T

Thanks man, I finished Daring greatly. I'm gonna read the 7 habits next. Then, I'll stop there. And just work on owning the concepts.

Day 31: What I did: woke up from my night shift in the afternoon.went to hot yoga.spent some time with my sister and her husband at the mall.bought a new leather jacket.ate dinner with my family at this hakka restaurant.What I'm grateful for: the good hakka food I ate.going to hot yoga despite only 3 hours of sleep finishing my work-shifts. and now I'm on my weekend. buying a new leather jacket! _______________________________________________________ I'm still debating on what to read next. I have a few options. I'm skimming a few of these books that I have. Or I might just finish an audiobook or something. I'll fix my schedule up for this coming week tomorrow. I spent the time after dinner today to do some cleaning up in my room, doing laundry, and cleaning myself up. I'll also adjust my budget tomorrow for the coming months. Thanks, T

I felt belittled/insulted when he didn't bother explaining his standpoint. I needed him to explain where he was coming from. I asked politely - but felt frustrated, angry, and outraged when he outsourced his opinion somewhere in your 31 page journal. and he wasn't even sure if it was the right journal. I needed him to relate/explain/ talk to me "eye to eye" or "level with me". And I'm surprised and also grateful for you stepping in, and doing that for him. I appreciate your help. I apologize for sounding crude. I was reacting based on my own feelings/ perceptions. Don't take it to heart, sorry.

Hey man, thanks for the opinion. Care to elaborate on why you think yoga and meditation is dangerous? I've made a post on that probably in Mario Journal (@WorkInProgress), where I gave at least 10 sources of my knowledge. You can find it here, but if you don't then I'll find it and give you a link/copy that when I'll have more time Dude, ur crazy. as your name says. i cant tell if you are serious or not. I just finished a 12 hour night shift expecting a decent explanation. LOL, and I get this crap. What a joke.

Hey man, thanks for the opinion. Care to elaborate on why you think yoga and meditation is dangerous?

Day 29: I'm posting earlier because I've for a night shift tonight. What I have done so far: 15 min meditation15 min reviewing medical informationfinished 275/275 pages of Slight Edge.What I am grateful for: Finishing the Slight EdgeHaving a place to workMy mother's cooking is awesome Re-igniting my passion for reading! _________________________________________________________ The day just started, but I decided to write earlier. I won't have the time later on in the day when things are busiest. Anyway, I'm looking forward to my days off starting Friday. It'll be 8 days off, but I might pick up some shifts along the way. Actually, I'll most probably will pick up some shifts. But in any case, I'll take the time off to review the Slight Edge, review my plans and make some solid goals for the future. The past few days have been less about socializing, and more about quietly working. Although I still socialize with people. That's something I enjoy now. I'm just thinking more about how I can constantly practice the lessons I've learned so that way I can integrate them more so in my life. I'll explore this a bit more as time goes on. This weekend especially, will be dedicated towards that endeavor. Kind Regards, T

Thanks Mario! I'm not a Buddhist by the way. That was just where I got the idea from. That was another idea I explored as well, the idea of going slow specifically and focusing on what I am doing. Despite labels, I think we are acknowledging the same problem. Thanks for your help!

great job being focused WorkInProgress! And nice work cleaning your room. You listed juggling as an activity to do when you're tired though, is that even relaxing? jokes aside, keep up the good work

hey have fun in your holiday time! and wow 9x50 mins studying! That's amazing! Keep it up

sucks about the scam. i've almost been scammed on kijiji but thought the better of it. I was about to send my laptop to africa without getting paid hahaha. luckily it was a holiday and the post-office was closed. the next day I spoke with a close friend who advised me otherwise, and then checked with paypal to confirm the legitimacy of the trade - which was obviously not legit.

Nice job coming back! Best of luck Jeremias!

welcome mr. jarret! I can relate a lot to your goals. I have some recommendations. You don't have to follow them, but I'd like to share what helped me: Delete your steam account. Burn the bridge: https://www.reddit.com/r/StopGaming/comments/2t384s/how_to_get_rid_of_your_steam_account_in_60_mins/ Read the Slight Edge (it's a self-development book): It'll give you perspective and a map on where you are, and why you are where you are, and how to get where you are going. Try Meet-up.com (try new activities like volleyball, yoga, hiking, trampoline dodge-ball, etc): Try new activities on a whim. You might have some negative self-talk like I did regarding trying new things. Mine was, "I'm not a pro at volleyball, so why bother". But I went anyway. The point is, you don't need a reason other than the pure satisfaction of doing something you set out to do. And the courage to SHOW UP. Doesn't matter if you think you are not worthy for whatever reason. Doesn't matter if you do something silly in that time that you show up, what matters is you show up - and that in and of itself is enough because it's courageous. Basically now that you've decided to quit games, you will have so much time. And it's important to plan ahead of time, and fill those empty time-slots with NEW FUN things that you've been wanting to try. Because you want to essentially live the life you always wanted to live, but were distracting yourself from with gaming. So the most important thing for now is to fill those open time-slots/void with activities that you have been wanting to try. That's to start. This is all from Respawn mostly. But I've used this, and so that's why I'm recommending them. T

Day 28: Today was a good day. What I did: woke up early. read 250/275 pages of the slight edge.went to my work to re-instate my ID badge. I lose mine the other day.came back to my city, and went to a chapters. Bought this book on some buddhist teachings. mostly to deal with my recently troubled mind. went to 1 hr hot yoga.meditated for 15 minsWhat I'm grateful for: Having read this far into the slight edge. Now I just have to finish it tomorrow.Somehow reading the teachings from this buddhist book taught me a lot about how to deal with my percolating mind. And I went into hot yoga working hard, and smiling the whole time.the little culture we have in the hot yoga class, it's filled with positive people.my family. _____________________________________________ The only thing I regret is forgetting that I was working a night shift on Thursday. That means I won't be able to go to the gig my yoga teacher has, I was telling him I really wanted to go watch him play guitar and sing. Damnit! I kinda want to tell him I won't be able to make it, he probably didn't even notice that I told him I wanted to go. But anyway, if I get the chance I'll tell him. No use crying over spilled milk. The other thing that was really important today was reading up on some Buddhist teaching. My issue was that I was so troubled with trying to "get things right" in this whole business of self-improvement. Being so concerned that I may not be doing the right things to get me where I want to go, and then it made me not enjoy the things I was already doing. My mind was just muddled with chasing this success. I was more confused, overwhelmed with thought if anything. And the book just reminded me that we spend all our lives chasing the carrot of "just a little more". Just a little more information. Just a little more effort. Just a little more friends. Just a little more achievements. Just a little more self improvement... I just had to notice myself caught in that cycle. Because in that head-space, nothing is ever enough. Trying so hard to put all of these "things" together, so that way I can approve of "myself". When really, there is no self. T

Thanks Piotr! I will work on it

yoga is awesome ! anytime Cam

Day 27: Hey Reno, I do both days and nights. Since my occupation runs 24/7, it is required that we work both. The best thing I can recommend when doing night shifts, is to take your breaks. We get a 2 hour break. And if I don't take those, the drive home usually gets harder with a sleepy mind on the highway. What I've done: did a training session at workcame back from my night shift.woke up at 1600 hr.went to hot yoga for 1.5 hrs.went to the volleyball session after.came back home.What I'm grateful for: although feeling uncertain about where I want to take my life now... I am grateful for the uncertainty, I would like to see it as an opportunity to grow versus give-up.enjoying a nice meal after all the activities today.being able to notice myself losing "engagement", hence the uncertainty, but noticing that I want to change the direction of where I am going. there is definitely abundance all around me. thank you world! _________________________________________ Recently I noticed myself feeling "stale". Specifically noticing the constant "consumer" mindset and habits that I have. Although I have this intention for self improvement, I noticed that there is a STRONG consumer behavior attached to it. The fact that I bought maybe 4-5 books in the past 2 weeks is a little ridiculous. I have always had this tendency to make unreasonable purchases. Even with the meditations that I do, I had to purchase a brain entrainment program. I just don't buy into all this all that much. Sorry to sound somewhat negative, but to be honest there is definitely a line I have to draw. I think I have fallen into that consumer mindset, that is so automatic in our culture. So my intentions are right. But now I take a moment of pause - to reflect. Some of my actions, some of my urges, some of my decisions have failed me in that although they come from "positive intentions" (i.e. self-improvement), I have been blinded by that facade, and then falling prey to consumerism. The real question now is, would I be able to adjust my behavior to reflect a mindfulness about consumption? To not equate "self-improvement" with how new or or how much of material possessions I have. I think somewhere along the line, I've sacrificed real hard earned growth for new material possessions that present themselves as "self-improvement material". But, without being too hard on myself, I have been doing a lot of good for myself. For example: keeping up with yoga, in fact increasing in frequency, reading constantly, going in to work with a positive attitude, not playing games, really developing a thinking mindset where I aim for educating myself in all of these endeavors. Thats it for now, T

Welcome Caless! Wish you luck in your endeavours.

Day 26: What I'm grateful for: going to yoga.Meeting this musician at yoga, and him telling me about a gig he's doing, and the owner of the yoga place we go to he's gonna bring him to play as well. If I find out what the time is, I'll actually go check that out.Only getting 4 hours of sleep, but still doing what I had to do.a place to workWhat I Did: woke up at 1300 hr from night shiftread 220/275 pgs of slight edgebought new pair of yoga shorts, and bought "daily stoic" a book that has one stoich quote to meditate on for each day of the year.went to a 1.5 hr hot yoga class, and met a well established local musican. came home and meditated for 30 mins.studied nursing theory for 7 mins._____________________________________________________ Overall a good day. I love hot yoga and how it makes me feel really good about myself towards the end of a pain-stakingly tiring hour or hour and a half. Gonna do one more night shift, and I get to rest for 2 days. T

just meditating on letting thoughts pass, and not clinging onto them. Trying to be present. aiming for awareness in what I am feeling, what is going on. but mostly letting go.

great job resisting the urge to watch anime Kiki!

Alex, your photos are so nice! Thanks for sharing the awesome moments in your life.

I was in the same situation man. Welcome back

Hitaru, you gotta check out the Slight Edge. I'm halfway reading it. It relates a lot to your questions. He mentions in the beginning that when we hit rock bottom we do everything we can to improve our lives. Then when we start surviving. JUST SURVIVING. And we get COMFORTABLE. When we do, we stop doing the things that took us from failure to survival. Then we start going back DOWN to failure. But the very same things that took us from failure to survival, are the exact same things that can take us from survival to SUCCESS, in whatever it is we want to do - if we just keep doing them. So it's just a matter of consistency. We already know what we need to do. The problem is that we just stop doing them. It's about consistent habits over time. Compound interest. habits that are easy to do - but also easy not to do. habits that we don't immediately see the results to, but over time, produces the success we want. Check out the book dude, it's awesome. That's my recommendation. T

Hey CD! Welcome to the community. I wish you the best in your endeavors. Count on us. We are here for you.