Irishrican950

Day 90! MADE IT! Alright well I am stoked to say I am 90 days free of gaming and I don't intend to return to it anytime soon. What I am excited to continue to do is explore where else to drop addicting habits. If anyone has any recommendations of other forums or ways to stay in community while breaking addictions let me know. I'd love to stop going on the internet as much as I do and break more of my rebellious/impulsive patterns. Def here for the work to level up in a new way. Big love to all of you who commented and liked my posts along the way. Meant the world and made a huge difference in helping me stay on this. Excited to keep LIVING in this world. That's what it's all about. Respect always, D

Day 89, Back at it with work this week. Excited to learn that my contract was extended 6 months so I will have my 9-5 going thru most of the rest of this year. Overall was a great day that ended well as I drove at night to train in both Capoeira & Iaido. Monday's are becoming one of the better days for me given it's more packed with things I have scheduled myself to do. One more day! -D

Day 87+88 Spent the weekend in New York with my sister and connected with some intentional community down there. I haven't seen her in awhile. Was cool to see how similar we have become over the years. I really appreciate her. Overall excited to wrap up this challenge in a few days and see what is next to cut out of my life. Regards, -D

Day 85 + 86, More trials around new addictions unfolding around the Internet mostly and some binge watching of shows. Really it comes down to alone time at home... that is what needs to shift for me. I hope to just add more activities and people in my life in the coming days and months ahead... overall I am happier and seem to be making progress towards more productive days. - D

Thanks bro! Appreciate you following my journey and being incredibly supportive along the way. Day 84 - much like yesterday. Processing a lot of doing the best that I can to try and be with the emotions instead of run from them. Was a day that saw me not be as productive as I could have been but overall managing myself well. Writing these posts is challenging as I am not always so great at finishing things but I will get through this! 6 days out. -D

Day 83, Been a tough day. Processing some personal stuff that came up for me over the weekend... blessed into my workday. Dog walk helped but in general I notice that I need to probably move my body more before trying to sit and do a desk job when I don't feel safe in my body/am stressing/have stories running in my head. Feeling much better and in my body after training and wrapping up the day. Tonight I made both my training classes as scheduled. Great to finish the day feeling ok after such a shaky start. Finishing strong is key. 7 more days until 90! -D

Day 82, Solid Sunday this weekend. Hung out with family and prepped for the week. Definitely noticing that I watched too much TV this weekend but it was perhaps the escape I needed after all the work I've done thus far. -D

Day 80 + 81, Ended the work week with a decent amount of work done and have been essentially on a 2 day Netflix binge from a show recommended to me by some work colleagues. Noticing that really my addictive pattern is overconsumption of something I enjoy. I'm almost 2 seasons into this show and I really enjoying watching it to the point of just doing a whole lot of nothing with my schedule being light. I sense that the TV show is actually providing some benefit though as not just an escape like a game - I am relating to certain characters and it's making me question and view how I show up in the world using them as mirrors so that's interesting to notice and think about. I've got a more scheduled day tomorrow so curbing the TV binging will be healthy tomorrow. 8 days to 90... -D

Day 79, Solid day today overall. Was productive. Noticing still that I rebel a lot.. even in productivity. It's hard to stay on task with what I truly want to be doing at times. I'm like an impulsive rebel. 11 days until 90 though... still holding strong. -D

Day 78, Solid day especially for not taking my meds. Overall the end game seems to be drawing near and I am excited to see what I plan to detox from next. This whole process has helped me see the value in journaling each day. Regards, -D

Day 77, Overall a productive day. Felt like I could have done more but overall - it was pretty solid in terms of structure and what I was able to do. The addiction to game has been replaced with scrolling on my phone when I don't have anything scheduled... that's going to be the next thing to cut for sure... I need to continue to build ways to keep my phone away from me and set activities and goals that keep me busy and social. Regards, D

Day 73-76 Spent the weekend with friends and family. Been away from my computer mostly and missed a few days again of journaling. All and all it's becoming easier to not game and talk about it as an addiction in the past that I am breaking away from. Overall I feel a sense of duty to continue this pattern in other areas of my life. I am someone who loves to rebel at times, enjoys addictive things and creature comforts. I don't want to be as distracted as I am most days and I know this has been very helpful so I am considering how to best keep a practice like this going after my 90 day challenge is up. I think I'll just keep journalling either on here or on my own. The idea of 75 hard has come to mind as my next challenge... that or doing another 90 day detox. -D

Day 72, Day 90 days seems like it's just on the horizon. I look forward to it and welcome a new challenge. Perhaps 75 Hard. Decent day today overall. 90% of the the things I wanted to do today accomplished. Excited to be back working and having my finances stabilizing through all this as well... things seem to be looking up. Sending you all so much love, -D

Day 71, Solid day - not the best morning start but a solid day until the late evening. I had a good training session but what pretty much useless after that. Closing out the day with a little bit of creativity seems to be tough as I tend to get distracted on my phone.

Day 70, Games are like a total after thought these days. Reaffirms the power of daily intention. New job is proving to be both challenging and fun as I meet a lot of new people each day and join a fun outdoorsy culture. I feel blessed to be this far along on the detox. Still not totally crushing my days but I am doing better it seems each day and that's all I can ask for. -D

Day 66-69 Took some time off and went down to Puerto Rico to hang out with family. Still clean on gaming. Probably should have kept up with the journal on Sunday but I forgot TBH. I see now why sticking to this every day is so powerful... a few days off and things can get dicy in terms of a routine. Good to be back going into what I plan to be a structured week. -D

Day 64 - yesterday - was a productive day overall. My 3rd day of my new job and second martial arts class that I now take on Wednesdays. Felt tired at the end of the day and slept well but forgot to put this journal entry in. Day 65 - woke up from a lot of dreams that had me out in the world getting into all sorts of dilemmas that left me stressed and putting others in stressful situations too. It's almost like the part of me who loves to be out there taking risks and on the adventure is wanted to unleash in my dreams. Probably a mix of not gaming and being a homebody most days in my hometown. Overall I'm struggling to just stay focused and be on a computer all day for my job so I keep taking little breaks here and there to walk the dog/exercise/move my body. Noticing a lot of desire to escape or want to just get on my phone and scroll. Also still lots of resistance to hold myself accountable to checking my schedule and doing my to do list but I am slowly sensing some of these addictive pulls becoming less strong. Onward! -D

Day 63, Had an overall productive first day on the job and also took my first Capoeira class in years. Solid day overall. As much of a mountain I've made it to have my day so structured... I continue to see how it's so key for me. I naturally rebel. If I have free time - I will often default by doing the other things I need to do or just totally distract myself from the thing I want to.be doing. Following a calendar is forcing me to adjust. -D

Day 62, Had the whole day on the calendar going in stuck to it pretty well! Feeling good. Start a new job tomorrow. Wish me luck fam! -D

Thanks brother!! Day 61, Did some Tai Chi this morning with my mom. Every morning I do that I feel so drained... learning the flow of the movement while thinking so early is so taxing on me... I find it harder than working out... which I just did as well. About to drive to a friend's and practice DJing on his club level equipment. Great day overall. Really working at following my schedule... I am such a rebel by condition.. just doing the things I set out to do is so key. -D

Day 60, Good day. Have 3 major tasks I wanted accomplished today. Got the top 2 knocked out today and once again find myself having a hard time going as the night progresses in order to finish. Progress over perfection. Will get back on the horse tomorrow. Proud of myself tho... I organized all my bills paperwork and got my calendar laid out for the rest of the month. Not fun things but I feel great now that those are done. Need to embrace this more. -D

Day 59, Overall it was an ok day. I notice that I procrastinate the most after dinner in the evenings. I get easily distracted by my phone, the news and social media. I am really struggling to stay on schedule. I've got my day planned for tomorrow. Going to keep at it. It seems to be a really important practice for me to try and harness... scheduling... and then actually staying on task. I accomplished about half the things I wanted to get to and not in the order I planned them. I did the second most important thing on my list but failed to complete the first. Tomorrow is another day.

Day 58, Getting sloppy on not getting on here everyday. The past couple days I've completed about 50% of what I have set out for myself to do. Yesterday I found that I got up early... crashed by the late morning but was productive most of the day. I let myself go in the evening and ended up talking on the phone with a friend for a few hours in stead of staying on task. Will report back on how today progresses in a separate post towards the end of the day. Regards, - D

Day 56 + 57, This is smart. I do want to continue to get to 90 days but I agree... it would be valuable to actually count the days that I actually do what I commit to doing. I like that. I'm going to incorporate this and journal in the mornings (like I have been) ti plan my day and then make updates on here towards the end of the day to say if I did the thing that I committed to doing. Love it. It's time to really focus on deconditioning the rebel in me who wants to do whatever I can against authority.... including my own. -D

Day 55, Stressed out today as I am dealing with various paperwork for my job. I think my avoidant tendencies get me into trouble emotionally when there's a lot of scrutiny on me. Day 56, Took the day off to just venture around town, walk around and watch a movie. Overall - I'm stuggling to stay on task with my commitments... the urge to game as a means to escape is gone but other ways seems to love to replace it. The fight is real.