ZDub

My name is Zak. I some how managed to get through early adult life with a gaming addiction/"passion". I am turning 30 and quite honestly I have a lot of things going for me in my life, an awesome family, a great job, and a girlfriend who loves me very much. To put it bluntly I game entirely too much. I play DOTA 2 some times as much as 40hrs/wk, that doesn't include the hours spent watching professionals or reading other content to try and get better. The only way I manage to do that is sheer neglect of other responsibilities. However unlike the catcher in the rye I am very well aware of the cliff that looms shortly in front of me, I sense a very real catastrophic fuck up coming and if I don't do something I'll be left with my gaming addiction, whole lot of regret, and some stories about "how it use to be". I've gone through self improvement before and I am not afraid to go through it again. As they say the first step is admitting that there is a problem no matter how cliche that sounds it's true. Quick Edit: A large reason for starting this new chapter was considering my future. I constantly think about a nightmare scenario where I consider what I am willing to neglecting now in my life for gaming and not knowing where that neglect will stop. To think about a future where I could neglect my family for an addiction is scary and feels shameful.