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Jeremias
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Posts posted by Jeremias
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Day 16
I'm on my phone again, but this time I'm on holiday in Noosa, Australia. It's a pretty nice part of the world.
I've had a pretty good end to the week. I made a presentation to my colleagues on Friday morning which went better than expected - I haven't always been the best public speaker so it's great to feel some progress there.
On Saturday morning, I headed on a family holiday to the beach and I'll be here until next Sunday. Life's good and I'm not really thinking about anything else at the moment.
Progress on my goals:
- Fitness: I'm feeling great, but I'm also eating a lot on holidays. It seems to be disappearing but a week without the gym may make things worse. I have started tracking my bodyfat, weight and muscle on excel after each gym session.
- Wealth: I made a good presentation the other day, but it is important to leave a lasting impression during my last week at the company next week. I'll have a think about this in advance.
- Hobbies: On hiatus at the moment, but I have been locking in some dates for next year.
- Happiness: I'm really enjoying time with my cousins. Perhaps I should checkin with my friends at home when I get back.
Thanks everyone and keep up the good work
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Good on you for returning. I relate to your sense of 'denying your own situations' sometimes when I am up late on a Sunday night on the internet. I think to myself "I should go to sleep, I'll feel great for work tomorrow" but sometimes I'll proceed to mindlessly browse the internet anyway. I'm working on it too, but I find it helps to take one day at a time
It's been about 8 months since you first posted. Looking back to the personal progression you've made over the last 8 months, do you have any vision of where you'll be 8 months from now? Do the games or alcohol exist in that vision and if so, to what extent?
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Day 10
Sorry I haven't posted since last Thursday. I have been busy on weekdays and lazy on the weekend to make a proper post. That's what I tell myself anyway. The truth is that I've been putting off writing a journal with the idea that I can make it longer, well formatted and accounting for the goals I set out.
I'm sitting on the bus on the way to work right now, thinking it'll be better to get something down.
Regarding the detox, the initial high has worn off and I'm starting to knuckle down on the challenge. I'm happier on the weekdays than on the weekends because I'm more busy - I spent hours last Sunday on youtube and reddit out of boredom. It's a slippery slope and I need to take more initiative in getting out on the weekends.
That said, my time spent at work and the gym has been well spent. I've spoken to some friends I haven't seen recently, with ideas in my head but no real plans yet. I've requested the syllabus for next year's exam and practiced a bit on the weekend. Not a bad week but it could definitely be better.
I've figured that I can use google sheets on my phone to track my gym progress. I'll whip together a template in my off time and show you soon.
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Thank you everyone! It's great to see new and familiar faces as the forum grows.
Sounds like we've gone through similar processes of relapse, as I also thought I could play in moderation. It never worked for longer than a couple of days. If you're looking for hindsight, you might get some ideas from my own relapse posts early in my journal about what you can do to prevent it occurring again.
Hey Alex, I've read through the sections of your journal around your first two relapses and the reasons behind both sound very similar to mine! I will follow in your footsteps and keep at it. I recently saw the documentary you were a part of - it was insightful so good on you for doing it.
Can you specify your goals a little bit more?
Hey Mad Pharmacist
Thanks for asking - I've had a good think about my goals, but I need to make them more specific as time goes by. They are as follows:
- Journal
- I want to stay active on this forum to keep track of my progress, but not too active so I'm not thinking about it constantly. I think around twice per week is a good approximate.
- Fitness
- I want to look and feel good. This is easily measurable by body fat and skeletal muscle mass measurements at my gym, but better measurements could be made by body dimensions (waist size etc.)
- I want to start running again, following from my hamstring injury months ago. I will need to run for short distances regularly. This is something I used to be excited about, but the gym took over. It will be interesting doing both in tandem.
- Wealth
- I want to save money for a house. This is a momentous goal that I will need to actively implement short-term goals to achieve, including good academic results at university and self-improvement in the right areas. This goal is also multi-faceted meaning that measuring my progress may be difficult, but I have some ideas.
- Hobbies
- I want to complete my Associate of Music next year. This is pretty easy to measure - you either pass or you fail!
- There are various other possibilities I have in mind, but I am not yet ready to commit to too much. I'll leave myself space to grow as time goes by
- Happiness
- I want to be a good friend and an increasingly independent son. I would rather not measure this goal too closely
- I want to be a good friend and an increasingly independent son. I would rather not measure this goal too closely
I will elaborate on these goals as I make some progress.
I have had a very productive week. I'm starting to get more sleep again, which is nice. I have been to the gym each day except for Tuesday, when I was going out to dinner with some friends from uni. This weekend I'll be spending some time at the beach, and I'll book some flights for a big holiday away! Stay posted on that one...
Thanks for reading.
- Journal
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Take care of your back! It's one of the most common injuries and it can grow worse over time. As good as it feels to lift heavy, I would recommend stepping down the weight until you're confident that you are feeling your core and glutes engaged, then slowly ramp it up from there. I'm an evening gym-goer myself, I find it keeps my sleeping schedule more consistent.
Keep fighting
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I return to this forum 6 months after my first attempt at a detox in May 2016.
During the 20 days or so I managed on my first detox, I filled what felt like an abundance of time with several new activities. I was making considerable improvements in speaking Portuguese, playing music and playing pool, whilst continuing my intensive fitness schedule. I was feeling fantastic throughout the week, but the weekends presented a massive void of time that proved too difficult to fill. I found myself sitting around bored for hours most weekends, never fully committing to the lifestyle change required to go 90 days without gaming.
I have attempted a detox a couple more times since then, but I have never surpassed the 20-ish days I set in May. I have been playing for the last couple of months in the belief that I can moderate myself, though as foretold by others in this forum my acceptable amounts of gaming has very slowly snowballed into something much worse.
I will stop my gaming immediately. I have not yet assembled a plan, but I will not let that stop me from getting started. On my commute home, I will consider how I can use hindsight from my previous attempts to achieve something much better this time around. I need to carefully consider why zero gaming whatsoever is better than small amounts of it, and hold myself accountable to goals that I can check regularly. My goals will be focused around:
- Fitness
- Money
- Progress in my new hobbies
- Helping other people be happy
I haven't yet figured out what I'll do when my body needs to relax but my brain is racing - this is where gaming normally comes in. I'll note down some plans here soon.
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Hey all.
Whilst I haven't been maintaining this journal for a long while now, I thought I'd give an update for the benefit of everyone. I feel that forums like these are abundant in posts from motivated people in their first few weeks, eager about the idea of starting. However, you less commonly hear from those who fall off the bandwagon.
It's been 109 days since I first posted in this journal, and there have been some big changes since this time. So I guess I'll summarise:
- I was enthusiastically posting during my first 20 days, increasing my running training to 5-6 days per week and reading every day. I found new ways to challenge myself, starting talking to a friend on this forum, and generally becoming more self-aware of my habits and tendencies. I was feeling great, but still struggling to fill the time and I grew somewhat dependent on reading this forum or self-development articles.
- I began relapsing occasionally around day 20, generally playing for 5 hours or so before uninstalling the game in disappointment. I was disappointed in myself, but took responsibility for it and really tried to pick myself up. I found things more difficult after a niggling hamstring injury prevented me from running, forcing me to pick up new activities that were not meaningful to me. My journal posts above stop at around day 40, but I continued keeping notes in my personal journal.
- Around day 50 I felt myself playing until around 2am on a Sunday night, leaving me tired for the next day of work. At the time I felt that this was unacceptable, and I proceeded to draft up a plan to reorganise my life. In hindsight, it's cool to see how my standards have changed. Whilst I managed to clean out half of my room's contents, program a system to analyse my spending and minimise my dependencies on other people, my hamstring injury still held me back. I was making adjustments to my work and home environments that played with my 'behaviour of least resistance' (a term I coined just now) such as putting my computer away and charging my phone away from my bed. I think that this is the most important idea I've learnt from the last 110 days: an idea I didn't learn from any book or video, but through self-awareness. For anyone reading, I would strongly recommend having a think about this in relation to your behaviour in eating, working, relaxing on weekdays or weekends, etc.
- Pokemon GO was released around day 70, which I got right into and ultimately led to me playing games once again. I was bored from the grind a few weeks later, and put my computer away once again for a couple more weeks. Since this time, I've been putting my computer away whenever I err on the side of too much gaming.
My most important takeaways in hindsight:
- The 90 day challenge has helped me become more self-aware, independent, astute, disciplined and enthusiastic. I've made great changes and drastically reduced my time spent sitting on the computer despite not strictly completing the challenge.
- Manipulate your environment to help influence your behaviour
- Never stop trying to surround yourself with people you want to be more like
- Physically optimise your environment. Remove triggers for negative habit loops and add triggers that encourage positive habits
- In my opinion, there are times more should be said about hardening up and just doing the thing you want done. There are times I found myself reading (GQ forum, self-help books), writing and feeling good about myself without really accomplishing much. I learn a lot more by doing the thing I want done, and consulting books and articles only when specific help is required - I believe that the GQ forum should be used in a similar fashion.
- You cannot fail if you keep getting back up again. If at first you fail, try experimenting with new ideas and reflect on what works best.
Finally, I leave a massive and sincere thank you to @Cam for the hours he has put into the cause for almost nothing in return. I'm not sure where I'd be now without you. Also congratulations to @asquerade for making amazing progress during his 90 days, and a big thanks for being a bro through the process.
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Thanks for being a part of our community Jeremias. Really appreciate your great comments on others posts.
Likewise x10 Cam.
10/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 12
In an effort to fill the chasms in my plan for the upcoming weekend, I texted some of my friends if they were interested in coming and chilling on the weekend. One of my friends told me that he was busy, but would be keen to come by another weekend. Funnily enough, his GF (who I've acquainted previously) invited me to her party (this weekend) only an hour later. It just goes to show:
- Old friendships need a bit of effort to keep up. Simply talking to the people you like once every few months is often enough, almost serving as a reminder that you/they exist.
- One thing can lead to another - I hadn't planned on going out this weekend but hey
I slept terribly last night, and am starting to struggle again with the thought of relapse. I need to keep making the small choices correctly, carry out my plan for the weekend and keep up with the journal. If you can't go without gaming for 90 days, then you need to go without gaming for 90 days.
I really want to crack the 20 minute mark on my 5k tomorrow. I've been talking about it for weeks, but tomorrow looks like a good sunny day. I'll post within 36 hours.
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Don#t know about the others but I read everything you write.
^ I think you'd be surprised Paul
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9/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 11
Things are going well at the moment.
- I've been enjoying my work recently,
- My duolingo streak is back up to 5 days,
- I'm talking to one of my friends each day,
- My first self-haircut didn't end catastrophically,
- I've reduced my running training to 3-4 days per week to help prevent injury, but I'm enjoying it just as much as ever. I'm no longer feeling guilty when my legs need to rest instead of training. My hamstring is slowly starting to improve.
Before tomorrow, I need to fill in some of the chasms in my timetable for the upcoming long weekend.
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Hi Oct!
I'm not going to judge, but are you still living at home? I've read your journal and the first thing that came to mind was this video here, spoken by a guy on a screen who's gone a bit hippie recently but he has some good ideas in him sometimes (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kyhXttVakk).
This was the first thing that came to mind - the idea that maybe there would be benefit in forcing yourself out of your comfort zone.
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7/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 9
I saw Cam's latest video this morning about the importance of being proactive. It induced a little rant which I've written during some spare time at work today.
I feel I have been a reactive person for most of my past. Socially, I've always been shy and happy to go with the flow. Academically, I've always performed to the standards of those around me. Whenever I have moved away from home, my results at school have dropped.
In the last 6 months, I have been concluded that being reactive to those around me is not necessarily a bad thing, under certain circumstances. It has allowed me to perform well in several areas of my life, but I have recognised the dependence of my results on the environment that I subject myself to. I couldn't possibly be where I am today if it wasn't for the attitude instilled in me by my family, friends and role-models. My downfalls are equally dependent on my environment; if I play a game on the computer for a few days, conversing with people who are more toxic and depressed than your average person, I come out the other end more like them.
Stopping gaming has helped me take further responsibility for my actions. I can choose the people who I follow and who I converse with, and I can subject myself to environments where I will grow more than I would have in other environments. I consciously think about what friends I speak to and what activities I do with my time based on who I want to become. This has involved limiting my communication with old friends who game too much, stress out others around them and/or are content with mediocrity. I hope this doesn't come across as snobby, but it has helped me become more happy and more productive than I used to be.
I'm learning to take more responsibility for my mistakes and make less excuses. Regarding the detox, any relapses I have made have been my fault and there is always a way that I could have done better. Whilst I have been good in reducing my exposure to people who drag me down, I should be more proactive in helping those who empower me in any way I can. This is why I enjoying posting a lot on this forum - Cam's tireless work ethic and the consistency of other contributors is something we can all learn from.
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Great video Cam, thank you. I strongly relate to the points that you made in this video. It has induced a self-reflective rant, which will be in my journal for today
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WOW Congratulations!
Some of my key personality traits were known to me for many years, but I didn't really observe them until recently
I find this is a common trait - I noted that Piotr, myself and various others have grown greater self-awareness which is helping with decision-making.
Good luck to you Dannigan.
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You legend! Congratulations on your success - you deserve it. Your words have made a big difference and I'll be watching this space.
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6/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 8
Phew, I survived the weekend
Laying out a plan for my weekend made this possible. Whilst I didn't stick to the plan for a majority of the time, the mere act of coming up with things that I want to get done this weekend assisted me during moments I would have otherwise felt bored. Despite this, I did find myself on YouTube late at night for a few hours at the end of Sunday. It feels so silly that I'm anxiously waiting for the weekend to pass, while everyone else in the world wishes they could have more time in their life... I could either find more things to do on the weekend, become more dedicated to the hobbies that I already have or get a casual job. Maybe I can start a little freelancing? I'm not sure.
Today
- Whilst focusing on work is most important while I am at work, I want to spend my free time more productively. This means completing more boring tasks that I may not feel like on the weekend, such as shopping and planning. In return, I will be decreasing my time reading news and running articles.
- I started playing with the idea of buying Rocksmith in my head - I already own an electric (which needs repairing) but I stopped playing due after I reached a plateau. It could help me make another step up
- I've looked into Toastmasters and it looks very interesting, but the cost seems pretty steep for once a month. I guess it would probably be worth it in return for tackling one of my big weaknesses
- I've almost finished reading 'Born to Run,' which is pretty interesting if you're into that kind of thing
- I've resumed playing in my old band on Monday nights
Tomorrow
- Interval training on the circuit
- Work
- Duolingo on the commute
- Cut my own hair, for the first time.
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Advice on how to implement positive changes without major stress? Weirdly they are things I want, I enjoy them in action and feel proud of myself for doing them. Maybe the success is not the trigger but damn if I can find it to remove it if not.
Your situation seems very similar to @hycniejsy's once he got to the end of his 90 day challenge. He had a few episodes of relapse before he decided that enough is enough and he started another 90 day journal. And look at him now - grinding his way through massive goals, it's pretty inspirational.
Maybe you just need to set another challenge for yourself? It may not need to be another 90 days, maybe there's something in your career or hobby of yours that you can aim towards? Personally, I find my goal of a marathon ambitious and very motivating; I would feel lost without a big picture of where I want to be in a year or so.
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4/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 6
I was anxious I would relapse from the moment I woke up at 3am until about 11am, at which point my day was rolling and I was starting to get some things done. I'm lucky to have the support from this forum, I really am.
Today
- I awoke at 3am and couldn't get back to sleep. I feel like my whole week is leading up to parkrun on Saturdays
- I completed 5km in 20:41: a fair bit slower than normal due to the rain, but at least I didn't injure myself
- I was occupied throughout my whole day thanks to the plan I made the week before
- Many games of pool played
- Shopping finished
- Began cleaning my room
- A fair bit of YooToob to be honest
Tomorrow
- A bit more cleaning of my room, and disposing of some old clutter
- Long run, rain hail or shine (unless it's very dangerous. I'll check the radar for a good time to go)
- Buy a mirror, and cut my own hair for the first time.
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3/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 4-5
I have started working on a new project at work yesterday, so I'm feeling much more productive and engaged at work. I'm enjoying my time there each day and the hours are flying by. In my spare time around my working hours, I've mostly been talking to my family/friends, playing pool and watching YouTube.
In regards to my exercise, I have been resting and doing some bodyweight exercises to strengthen my core and glutes. Whilst doing them, it has become evident that my right hamstring is not 100%, and it really does need more rest
I guess I'll need to exercise a couple more weeks of restraint. It appears the weekend is upon me once again, the last two of which I have relapsed out of boredom. This time around however, I have a plan set out to prevent this from happening. There is rain forecast which may ruin parts of my plans, but to quote @Piotr 2016:
Planning is the first step to make things done. It will not always be possible to get everything done as planned, but action will certainly bring you closer to better life. And that's the reason why the whole detox struggle is worth it.
Today
- I've been dreaming each morning this week. These dreams are not about games, like some others on this forum seem to experience. I never used to experience this as I would stay up late each night playing games, so I don't take it for granted!
- My productivity spikes the moment I start enjoying what I'm doing at work.
- A densely-packed plan for the following weekend is complete.
Tomorrow
- Parkrun under 20 minutes! I'm really going to push it this time; my hamstring can deal with it
- Write a journal post!
- Follow the plan and make the right choices
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Nicely done. Where did you source the figures stating that 100% of people under 18 have played video games?
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01/06/2016
Attempt 3 - Day 3
As the calendar flicks over one more month, I decided to check back on some goals I wrote down for Q2-2016. One of these was becoming a morning person naturally, which I have accomplished without the use of an alarm clock! I now wake up at around 6:45am each morning. My second goal was to run a half marathon, which I completed a few weeks ago and was very happy with.
The third and final goal on this list was taking steps to become more financially independent. Whilst I am working full time, it is a temporary placement and I don't believe that it constitutes for actively taking steps towards financial independence. I'd rather not make this post too long so I'll save the specifics for another time, but I'll be thinking more about this in the next few weeks.
I've almost completed making a cheesy timetable for the 48 hours of this weekend, full of activities that I can resort to if I am bored. It's not complete, but it will be a good guide for if I'm struggling with the cravings. This weekend, I will be prepared
Maybe I should just embrace my inner work-a-holic and get a part time job on Saturdays? We'll see.Today
- Slogged my way through a slow day at work, boring only due to me not having much to do.
- Strength exercises tonight with focus on glutes and core.
- Head to bed around 9:30pm
Tomorrow
- Wake at around 6am for an easy run. Purpose here is solely to focus on my form and activate my glutes whilst they are recovering from the exercises I'll do tonight.
- Get excited for the new project tomorrow at work
- Rest & recover at night
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Every day not gaming is a win. Appreciate yourself for your accomplishment.
I'm just going to leave this here. You can be proud of yourself for this!
If sleep is a problem, I'd strongly recommend exercise of any description.
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There's heaps of support on this forum to keep you in check when/if you need it
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I was one from four students which passed math(integrals) test, from 25 students group(!) which I'm very proud of.
Congratulations Piotr! You've been really consistent so it's always good to hear from you.
You seem really in tune with your body and your mind - would you attribute that to anything in particular? Is that something new that you've developed after you started your detox?
Getting Back Up
in Daily Journals
Posted
It's holiday season, and I have been back at it again. I'm honestly embarassed to post but I guess that's the way it is. I haven't really lost much, but I haven't really gained much either. I guess I'll never really know what I've lost until I see what other people can do with the time I've blown.
It started with a mobile game before escalating into downloading some of the other games I used to play. Now I've actually become bored of them (unusual) and I'm back here again.
Ah well. Life goes on.