NEW VIDEO: The EASIEST Way to Stop Gaming
Alexanderle
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Posts posted by Alexanderle
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48 minutes ago, Havey said:
Last thing on my mind is my friends. I feel like I am losing a deep connection with most of my friends. I used to have many friends with best friends too. Now I feel like I just have friends. I'm not sure why, perhaps I need to put more effort in. One reason could be with the work I do on myself I notice bad influences around me a lot easier making me judgemental, perhaps I have too high standards and expectations on how people should behave. But certainly my social network has got worse, specifically when I met my SO and went from going out with mates a lot to a more mature lifestyle.
I am not sure, how old you are, but isn't it kind of normal to lose friends, not only due to getting older, maybe more mature? And also as result through distance? Like, I knew quite some people in my old university, but most of those friendships are gone. I have 3 good friends left. And isn't this more worth than a thousand shallow friendships? And right now, you are also going through some serious changes and are questioning certain things in your life. And you are asking about a purpose in your life etc. This will obviously change you. You are about to become a new person.
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Hey welcome and have fun with this journal!
40 minutes ago, Tha Aung said:I know I need more instructions for my life and my family life to be better.
That is a great starting point for you. What do you think is missing?
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I am still on the moderation trip. I want to not measure the chips intake for now. Just voluntarily being able to stop in the middle. Nothing more nothing less.
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11 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:
I'm happy if I'm just thin I don't have to be totally shredded although that'd be even better.
Well then get shredded. You don't have to look ridiculous with too much muscles. But a little bit definitely makes you look quite good. Doesn't even require a sixpack.
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11 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:
But, I'm strongly leaning towards just staying at home. I like being around my mom. She's very loving and supportive. When she's not working crazy hours we go for walks and occasionally watch a comedy show on Netflix. No chance I'm gonna get her into anime, but that's okay 😄 .
It is good that you love your mom. But in nature, it is important that the parents eventually prepare the child for life. Some species are quite fast with that - like ducks. Other species spend more years with that process. But there will inevitably come a time, where you have to go away. There will also come a time, where you mother will not take care of you anymore, but you will take care of your mother. That is just life. One way to start this process, I think is to get your own place, where you feel safe. I never liked to live with roommates. It is wonderful. You can decorate everything the way you want. You can do what you want. It is your little paradise, where you are the king.
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6 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:
I'm so miserable it makes me sad beyond belief. It's terrible. After 80 weeks it hasn't improved and I'm just torturing myself with how to live life properly.
80 is just a contruct like past or future. You are always one step away from gaming. You are also one step away from hard work, playful fun and abstinence. That is called choice. Be grateful for that choice. What is a properly lived life? What do you think that is? Can you define that?
How was your sleep today?
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16 minutes ago, BooksandTrees said:
Oddly enough it's been 5 days and I haven't eaten a bite
That is so crazy that we consider that as an odd instance. During a project meeting, people would call me strange or weird for not eating sweets like I was some kind of an alien. Of course it was without evil intentions, but people seem to accept the idea that sweets are not necessarily healthy, but still part of our diet. And then they tell you that you are missing out on something. Quite similar mechanisms like alcohol intake, where it is considered cool to get wasted and throwing up is considered an accomplishment. Weird things those legal drugs. ^^
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4 hours ago, Phoenixking said:
My knees hurt now. But also my muscles. So that means I'm progressing, I think.
I think that is not necessarily true. It just means that you should slow down. It is this idea that progress occurs by going too far. That is absolutely not true. If you are having pain, slow it down a little bit. 🙂
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I think that I am also feeling very good. The bachelor thesis requires a lot of effort right now. I have to figure out all the statistics. Especially the principal component analysis is quite annoying. Besides that, it is fine I am able to continue to moderate myself. I hope some day, I will not need yet another authoritarian rule like this. In the end, moderation is just a different side of the coin. In a sense, it is like measuring the amount of days. And then there is an arbitrary cutoff point, according to which we are behaving fine. Whether it is two eggs, 30 grams of chips, 90 days of detox or whatever it is. And everything is based on numbers. I think that once I have all of that figured out, I want to start doing things due to my feelings. Not because of numbers.
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On 4/30/2020 at 12:12 AM, BooksandTrees said:
I bought them as a small indulgence for enjoyment maybe once a week
Whatever you like man. That is fine.
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2 minutes ago, Julon said:
For me it is that one thing that keeps me from anything productive. It‘s the biggest problem for me. I would like to browse only a bit, but i know that i can‘t control myself then. It‘s a major trigger for further problems like gaming.
Yes, I completely understand. That makes it very important. Just don't whip yourself for every "relapse" you encounter. Eventually, this hurts quite bad. Be kind to yourself and trust your abilities. You will figure it out. I am sure. 🙂I think the more you just stay committed and understand, how much it is in your way, the more you will realize that it is not some kind of monster that is hunting you, but just an annoying animal that is in your way. And then you can push it aside. It will still bark at you and here and then you will give it some attention, which is fine, but you are still commited to more important things.
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26 minutes ago, BooksandTrees said:
I think we should celebrate projects like scoring goals in a game or something.
But don't forget about the achievements, you achieved the last months, since you started to take care of yourself. I think that is also quite a bit achievement to become responsible. But I get your point. I think it can be quite hard in an industry like that to be congratulated.
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7 minutes ago, 9k0 said:
o I just deleted my steam profil with 180+ games!
Well done. dude! I think that is a pretty important step.
31 minutes ago, 9k0 said:Which isn't necessairly a bad thing, if its balanced!
Absolutely. Now with gaming out of the way, you can focus on your relationships and see, how it makes you feel, when something is not in balance. And I think, this is actually a super important aspect:
33 minutes ago, 9k0 said:I find it easy to put myself aside for others if it brings them enjoyment or pleasure.
Are you capable to put yourself aside to bring yourself enjoyment and pleasure. Not just in the sense of mindless browsing or brainwashed gaming. But actually in a way that you care for yourself, like you would take care of a person, you like spending time with.
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definitely a great article. Especially the tips - they don't just apply to burn out, I think they can also be helpful for people with depression which in a sense is quite similar in being burned out due to your current life situation.
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@9k0 I don't really think that it is too farfetched. If that is your dream than this is perfect. We all should dream too big as long as we are not suffering regarding our current stance.
10 minutes ago, 9k0 said:I kinda have a high conscience and find it hard to turn down other who needs my help, or just say no to social events I don't really want to attend, therefore I used gaming to make sure I didn't get asked in the first place.
So now you are feeling read to attend them or want to adress getting asked? Or is it a matter of being able to say no?
11 minutes ago, 9k0 said:I wanna specialize as a water and drainage engineer
gg man. That's awesome!
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1 hour ago, fofehi said:
What determines a bad habit or not?
Is this a considered as a question for me to answer or is it an expression of you ruminating about it? 🙂
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4 hours ago, 9k0 said:
I wanna say that I can do this, but it'll be very hard! So please gimme your support! Or I'll cry
Hey man and welcome here. My number one advice: Enjoy the process. This is not just about ungamifying your life, but upgrading it. What were you missing during gaming? What is your current ideal, who you will be in the future? Maybe this perception will change, maybe you find out new hobbies and passions on the way. Be open and don't bother too much about relapsing on the amount of days of not gaming. Relapse is your friend! Not your enemy.
6 hours ago, 9k0 said:So please gimme your support! Or I'll cry 😢
I have found out that the best way to get support is by giving it. Maybe sometimes you give too much support, maybe sometimes you say something wrong. That happens, but this give and get thing is very rewarding and also a nice reflection of yourself. Good luck dude!
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4 hours ago, Julon said:
It sucks obviously, but I try to learn from it. My phone is locked up at night now and I take it out after breakfast.
Don't get me wrong. I like the idea to browse less mindlessly, but what can you learn from it? If it is that you are "struggling" with it and that it is an important thing to be adressed that is awesome. But if you would feel bad about it to the point, where you would consider yourself weak and that even trying is useless than that would be a problem. Because you are not weak for that matter, you are applying a very tough measurement of success here. If I would try this, I would never survive one day. Because after working quite hard and with our exposure to digital media, it just kinda happens. The question is only, how much it interferes with you other objectives. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Constantly resetting the counter can be quite stressful and demoralizing.
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I agree with @BooksandTrees on this one. But I think that Erik is more the forgiving type of a person, which is as fine as your way of handling things. I have seen that after many years of not talking to each other, people would forgive each other, which is not a bad thing. Ofc, this begs the question, what abusing means?
18 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:I've got this 'sick of everything' feeling.
The question is, what is this feeling exactly and why is it here? If I am highly uncomfortable to speak with a person, maybe I should get the hell out there. But if I am just generally anxious about speaking to some people, but secretly would like to interact with them, maybe then I have to face it and observe, what happens, when I interact a little longer with them.
18 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:Which are the big 6?
A set of basic and highly effective exercises, which are part of almost every workout plan. What makes an exercise effective? It requires many musclegroups, joints, is intense and simulates a real life situation. Take a leg extension machine in the gym: You only train one muscle, one joint is involved, ofc it is intense, but it simulates no real situation. You will get very good at the leg extension machine. That's it. Now, lets apply this to squats: A ton of muscle groups (almost all of them) and many different joints are involved, it is super intense and it simulates a real situation: Every time, when you sit down and stand up, it is basically a squat. Why would you train standing up and sitting down in the gym? Well that is not a question now, but maybe when you are 90 years old, it will become relevant. Or take the deadlift, which basically simulates you picking up something of the floor. The big six are lunges, squat, deadlift, pulling, pushing, and rotation. And they can be done in a variety of fashions with your bodyweight or barbells etc. Everything else is extra and is only focusing on individual muscle groups to get some extra input. But most importantly: Once I understood this concept, I also understood, why I am doing an exercise. So I think this was quite helpful for me.
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5 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:
I removed sweets from my diet for 6 weeks during the quarantine and have lost 15 pounds. I bought sweets yesterday and I haven't touched them once. I don't use them fit stress relief anymore. It feels great. I take more joy and relief from weight loss and healthy eating now.
That is great man. Yeah, I really think that once we skip the sweet stuff, weight loss becomes quite easy. And once they are not a means for stress relief anymore, there almost seems to be no point of eating them at all. ^^
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Alright, what was noteworthy today?
I did everything accordingly. Only 30 grams of chips in the evening. I actually still have stuff left. I also bought some bread and sausages. So far, I would always eat them all. Like I could easily eat 5 to 8 sausages. Today, only the amount I wanted to eat. I also bought some corn wafers. The package contains 19 pieces. I usually have always eaten it right after I brought it home. Today, I ate only 4 of them. Actually my plan was to not eat them at all today, but that is fine. Overall, it is a miracle. I am quite happy about the results. Let's see, how it will continue and when I will relapse. Because, I am expecting the relapse and don't really care about it. It is part of it. Besides that, I also realized that I am perfectly able to moderate vegetables. I take the amount, I want to eat, and then I just eat that. Never really thought about it before. What makes stuff like bread so much harder? ^^ Another interesting thing is that I am eating slower. Quite the interesting side effect.
I also meditated again today and was listening to some Reiki music. Ofc the whole Reiki business is a gigantic placebo. Not scientific at all. But the music is great. Maybe, I can establish it in the evening to sleep better. Interesting, how all the sudden, I am becoming interested in meditation. I mean, as future psychologist, this stuff might be useful for sure, but that is not really the point here. This is mainly for my own relaxation.
I was talking to a female friend today for an hour. That was nice for a change. Lastly, I was a bit pissed of. The woman of my group, which I kinda liked at first turned out to be quite bitchy and impatient. Also, while the group is quite efficient, it is a bit of a bummer that the atmosphere is not really relaxed. Ofc, it is professional and everything and this is kinda what I wanted, because I also had groups, where no one is working and I had to do everything by myself. Luckily, this is not the case. But once we have something, we seem to be annoyed about something else. Jesus christ. xD
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2 minutes ago, Ikar said:
It's just my experience, but being sore the next day doesn't necessarily require me going "super-destroyer 10/10 100%" mode. I wouldn't enjoy doing all the exercises to the maximum either, let alone I could do that only twice or thrice per session. It's difficult to determine, but there's a cool middle-ground one can find 🙂
While taking my stuff into consideration, I think that I am actually are at this middle-ground. When I say never sore, I don't mean that I don't work hard during the workout. I really feel it immediatley afterwards. But it is more like something of 80 to 90 percent of my capacity. Even the last rep is always one, I can do with enough intensity and great form. Nothing like this "one more rep" stuff. Occasionally, I think it is fine to have a workout, where you go all in. Those are sometimes these LesMills workouts, they offer on campus. I really go all in. But that is the exception. I think it is quite motivating to be ready the next day, while also having a good workout the day before. So yeah, I would count that as middle-ground. ^^
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26 minutes ago, Julon said:
No (useless) browsing: 0 Days
How are you feeling, when you reset this counter?
Is programming a Visual Novel a "safe" hobby?
in Ask the Community
Posted
Hey man. Just a question: Is a baker a bad person? Llike he is selling sugary stuff. Sugar has the potential to create serious diseases. Some people eat to much sugar. So is the baker the problem? 🙂