caith

Day 1 Day zero? Relapse isn't good for any recovery community's morale, but I want to set a good example for you young guns by being honest. League of Legends has me back at it again. As soon as I made this post, I wanted to delete it - I knew I wouldn't last long. It's like I have nothing else to do when I get home bored.. except: I have 3 books checked out from the library in late 2012 that I've never finished and need to return, not to mention the varying titles I actually own and havnt finished. I have boxes from my move over a year ago still unpacked. My blood pressure is in a very high range and I need to be taking a 30 minute+ walk every night. I stay up late to play this game and have a dozen errands that need to be ran. The list is long and is something I should be writing down and accomplishing! I didn't want to follow this up like this, but I have to quit for at least 90 days. I have to. I have to. I'm tired of wasting my time doing nothing. I have to quit!!!

Thanks. OK so I have two books to read and I need a partner. Sounds good. Keeping it simple! I need to take adderall regularly, I am not the most motivated person and have trouble performing basic tasks and functions day to day. They are addictive, but not as bad for me as other things. They help me a lot. Gambling really is my worst addiction, but I haven't played since November. It's not as time consuming or compelling as video games and it doesn't feel as good as drugs but the thrill and the risk got me bad. I wish I had all that money back.

THE REAL REASON I AM QUITTING: Over a week ago on the Super Bowl I started up on Adderall again. I have been eating healthy and cleaning up my room and car, both which were trashed out beyond belief. Everything was going well until I combined my medication with playing League of Legends, ended up taking my stimulant at night to keep playing after work which turned into a few all night benders of gaming in less than a week. Not this again, I'm too old. I've lost jobs and girls and my mind doing this. The easy solution is to take the video games away and I'm only going to be left with healthy stuff to get into like work, reading and exercise. Hopefully.

Extra information: I smoke cigarettes. I am sober from weed and alcohol. Im 5'11 and I went from 170 to 230 in the last year from not doing drugs I guess. Maybe from dating my gf. In 2013-2014 I quit playing all together and my life got a lot better but I moved into a house where they play my favorite game, League of Legends and got right back into it. I can't take the mindless ranked matches anymore but I sure do think about it a lot. I have no education except a GED and I deliver pizza. I have a lot of horror stories with gaming, gaming on drugs and my wasted life. But I am ready to move forward...

(read post #3 for a simple run down of my breaking point and why I'm here. Big thanks to Cam for pointing me over this way) Day 1 My last match of LOL was February 15th a little after midnight. I played one game, got crushed and closed my room mate's laptop, left his room and went to the grocery store. I don't even own a computer that can play games at a decent fps or a TV. I have a Nintendo 3DS that I never use. My life is that baD but I have been working on it. At 29 years of age I can safely say that of all of my vices, gaming has easily wasted the most time and kept me from my potential. I did some chores. Took a walk, a shower and went to sleep. Woke up late. I worked, I went to the mall and to dinner with my current girlfriend. I got home and did my laundry, took a shower and then took a brisk walk in the night. I quit going to middle school to play Starcraft. I am too old to be in the situation that I am in, my education, physical health and finances have all fallen prey to my addiction. I am ready to invest my time wisely, plot and execute a healthy plan of living. I'm sick of it all.