cammyhammy

@Brian 88 days is awesome! What are your plans post-day 90? Gonna play in moderation or are you done with video games for good? As for Eudaimonic well being, I've never heard of the formal name for it, but I've definitely heard of the concept. Jordan Peterson gives out advice basically along the lines of the theory, saying that (and I'm paraphrasing) you should stop looking to live a "happy" life and starting trying to live a meaningful life. So many of our addictions are fueled by us trying to seek the short-term pleasure you get from checking social media or playing video games or some other activity that makes you feel good for a little, only to make you feel so worthless in the end. I definitely think we should spread the word more about this concept, I'm sure many of our members can benefit from it. Hope you have an awesome Friday!

Day 4-5: Not having any real urges to play video games, but I am starting to get bored. I do not have a license and do not have any "real" friends yet so I can't drive somewhere and/or hang out with people. I have been reading and actually solved a rubix cube for the first time without any instructions (best time so far is 3:30, if any of you like cubing let's talk :)), but these activities get a bit boring after a while. I think I may begin writing a short story today, but I've yet to decide on the topic or any real details. I think I may draw something today, I enjoy doing that. I've also decided that I'm going to start writing out 4 things I'm grateful for everyday since I've seen people doing this on here and it seems like a good idea. I'm grateful for: 1. Having enough money to buy a kindle 2. This forum, because it's the only place where I've found such a supportive and like-minded group of individuals who try to help each other quit video games and get their lives together 3. All of you for inspiring me to improve myself and to make something good of my life 4. Nature trails and nature in general, it's/they're (don't know which one's correct so I'm gonna put both) so beautiful Also thanks for the book suggestion @fawn_xoxo, I've downloaded it on my kindle and will start reading soon! Hope everyone has an epic Friday! ?

I get how you feel. People (for whatever reason, I'm no psychologist) like trivializing the problems of others. It sucks, but you must learn to ignore it; these peoples' opinions don't matter. And as for having no one on this forum to care about you, you have to adjust your expectations. How could we really, genuinely care for you when all we know about you is a few short snippets of information that you have posted on here? We don't know you in person and without you revealing deeply personal information and/or having one-on-one conversations with us, it is hard to develop a sense of care for you as a person. I promise you, though, that I recognize you as someone who is trying to improve himself and I care for you as much as one person can care for another without knowing them. Stick with what you're doing, try to find good and caring people in real life, and your situation will improve.

I don't know how to reply to your message so I'm just quoting. I do struggle with self-esteem. Some days (or some hours, it can change fast) I feel super confident and enthusiastic about whatever I'm doing and then for no reason at all I struggle making eye contact with the waiter or something like that. I think I am going to get this book.

Haha I see how that might seem a bit controversial, but I stand by my advice. I should clarify that when I say "do not compare your experience to mine", I really mean that people reading these posts shouldn't compare how they feel to how I feel. Thanks for the welcome! P.S. I've seen multiple people recommending Six Pillars of Self-esteem lately, starting to think I should get it. Does it really help with your self-esteem?

Day 0-3: I should mention before all I say that I have (for roughly 2 months prior to my initial post) quit video games in the past and have some experience with it, so please if you are reading my entries do not compare your experience to mine (and in general I would not recommend comparing yourself to others, it rarely leads to anything positive). I've heard that the urges to play video games are usually worst in the first week, but seeing as how this is my second (official) time quitting, they are not so bad for me. I have uninstalled Steam, Discord, and all other gaming-linked things with exception to Apex Legends so I can play with my brother (who is at college and who I rarely get to see) if he asks me. I have recently filled my time with other mind-engaging activities, like reading (I've been really enjoying Harry Potter and just got a Kindle Paperwhite), solving my rubix cube, and a little writing. I would definitely recommend that all of you who are trying to quit video games limit or completely cut off your connection to all gaming-related things in your life. Do not 'hang around' in the discords where your friends talk about gaming and play together, do not spend your newly expanded freetime watching other people play video games on streams or in real life, and do not keep your games installed 'just-because'. All of these things are potential lures, slowly and subtly pulling you back in the direction of your addiction. I like to use the metaphor of an alcoholic and a bar when reminding myself of why I shouldn't do any of the aforementioned things. Does it seem reasonable that an alcoholic should go to a bar just to 'hang out'? Does it seem reasonable that an alcoholic can socially-drink without becoming victim to alcoholism again? I don't think so. In this same sense, you should disconnect yourself from all things that previously tied you to gaming. I promise it will reduce the urges. On a semi-related note, I would also recommend that all of you cut down your time spent on the internet in general. It is so very easy in this day and age with the internet set up as it is to get lost in the endless pages of entertaining content on the internet. It is so easy to go on your phone, promising yourself that you are only going to check notifications, only to spend half the day scrolling through social media. This type of behavior (and I speak from experience) will provide you with nothing but a sense of emptiness and worthlessness when you reflect on your day only to realize that you wasted it on activities that you couldn't care less about. As a general rule (not just for the internet, but for life), do not act without purpose. When you feel yourself about to buy in to the destructive and far too common behavior that is boundless perusing of the internet, ask yourself, "What is my purpose in doing this?" If it is nothing but to escape from real-life (whether it be because you're bored, uncomfortable, or for no reason at all) refrain from doing it. I have found that by quitting video games, heavily limiting my time spent on my phone, and deleting all social media platforms I had, I have increased my focus significantly. I hadn't realized it before, but by using these things as an escape to real life, I was crippling myself both socially and mentally. My ability to communicate with others was extremely poor, and my focus was terrible. Now, I feel more interested in socialization (although I still struggle with making myself interested sometimes, I hope this comes with time) and I can easily sit down for hours and read. I have cut out the poisons that are habitual phone and video game use from my life and am now reaping the benefits! Anyway, thanks for the welcomes to the forum, I hope to stick around for a while :).

I've played video games addictively for years. I'm tired of being socially inept. I'm tired of not having real friends. I'm tired of spending so much of my time doing a task that I neither enjoy nor benefit from. Starting tomorrow, I will be on Day 1 and I am excited. I enjoy reading, so I know I can do that when I am bored, but I have need more goals. Right now I have decided that in the next 90 days (the time period I will not be playing any video games), I want to learn how to solve a rubix cube, write 5 short stories, and work on improving my social skills (if anyone knows of some sort of course that takes you through some baby steps of improving socially or gives you challenges to improve, I would be forever grateful for a link). Seeing as how I have 90 days of increased free time and only three goals, I would very much appreciate any suggestions for new things to do. Cheers!