[The First Four Days]

On 4/4/2019 at 3:40 PM, Catherine17 said:

So relatable, tbh. They provide a sense of distraction from your own thoughts. I used to 'listen' to some of them while trying to work and always ended up getting back to the screen, actually watching it, rather than doing what is important for me

I 100% agree. Ironically, I used to play games while watching said videos. So far though, I haven't felt youtube making me want to play games a ton unless it's a game my brothers or I own. However, I'll admit that the feeling of playing video games with other people (the youtuber) does have a huge draw on its own. For now, I am staying off of Netflix because I know for me, it's very much a "single-player game" where I can spend hours absorbing content and not feel the least bit better.

[The First Ten Days]

I'll be honest.
Although I have been doing extremely well these first ten days, I'm scared I'll slip up and relapse to square one. In a week or two, some family is coming from Canada and staying in my room while I will be on the couch downstairs where my brother's xbox one is. Everything is off my computer and phone but the console isn't something I own, I'll ask my parents/brother about putting it out of site until they want to use it or something. 
Other than that, I'm scared about the end of the 90 days. I just saw a post about someone who did the 90 day detox but went back to old habits. I haven't completed the 9 modules yet so I'm sure that will help. Either way, I need to start working on a plan for when I am done with the detox to either give it up permanently or have a highly regulated relationship with it. Any advice would be nice, but for now, here is the first ten days

90 day gaming detox
March,30
Day 1 of 90
Massive headache, need more water
Talked about games with my friends, mentioned I'm taking 90 days completely off
Unsure about whether or 
not watching YouTube gaming is ok

Day 2
literally dreamt pretty vividly about playing overwatch but a strange remake. In the dream, was crying about breaking my streak. 

Day 3
remembering things about video games I haven't touched in a year (injustice2 when talking about batman)

Day 4
Another dream about breaking my streak, but with hearthstone.

Day 5
Almost all my porn is video game related.

Day 6
Getting to bed/getting up an hour to a half hour earlier, spending the extra morning time on youtube.

Day 7
Tired, miserable

Day 8
need to go beyond 

Day 9 
took Netflix off phone

Day 10
Ow my head, wish I could play again.
 

[Playing Multiplayer Games "Alone"]

I hear everything your saying. I haven't run into a lot of cheating or people bragging about being on big teams (some of the friends I made through Overwatch are genuinely friendly people and I've had some as facebook friends). But, my mindset when I wrote that post was not very wise. I was just thinking about going back to the same old gaming habits and was looking for excuses. Below I quoted what you said about detoxing and It was really impactful. It's hard not to think about what my gaming situation will be like after the 90 detox (which I officially started last week). I like knowing the results before I start something, I like detail. 
One thing that I realize I will definetly change aside from just having healthier habits will be, rather than merely "engaging with the people I play with," I want to almost exclusively "play with the people I engage with." I have friends and brothers who are not addicted to games and have great lives but will still get together online or better yet in-person to play video games. While I often would rather play the dozens of tabletop games my friends and I have collected and hardly used in some cases, there are certain games and experiences that can be friendship building. The challenge is not taking them too seriously or trying to "practice" them on my own time. I think that is what I was trying to get at and I hope that's feasible when I've taken time to clear my head.

But you're right, shouldn't worry about it ? 

On 2/26/2019 at 8:21 AM, TwoSidedLife said:

Detoxing at it's core is about making the effort on your part to self improve aswell, since quitting/stopping won't change your life automatically. Some people here know full well they want to quit forever. Myself, I don't know if i'll go back and it's too much detail to analyse that fully. I just focus on the now, adjusting and living without gaming. I don't think about if, when, how ect. i'll go back to gaming.

 You should personally self reflect and re-evaluate WHY you want to 'make sure you engage with the people you're playing with'.

 

[The First Four Days]

So,

I just started the 90 day detox. After cleaning out my computer and my room, the only access to video games in my home is my brother's consoles which are in the basement in which he lives. Rarely need to go down there for anything.

Only a few days in but I am already literally dreaming of playing games again, some that I haven't played in years. I didn't sell anything or delete any accounts because I may want to revisit them in, even if rarely or only with friends, after the 90 days. It's difficult watching friends play video games and not being able to participate. 

I have already been enjoying the Headspace app a lot and have felt good about diverting most of my attention to finishing my bachelor's in graphic design as well as doing personal projects, but I still find a lot of my time being dominated by youtube and netflix, even if it is less than the time I spent on gaming. It's something I should manage better for sure. I watch a lot of youtube gaming but I'm more drawn to the commentary than the games themselves, sometimes just listening and not watching even. Can someone tell me what their experience has taught them about the correlation between game addiction and youtube/youtubegaming/netflix and movies in general is?

For now, here is my synopsis/journal of the first 4 days, 86 to go

 

March 30
Day 1 of 90
Massive headache, need more water
Talked about games with my friends, mentioned I'm taking 90 days completely off
Unsure about whether or 
not watching YouTube gaming is ok

Day 2
literally dreamt pretty vividly about playing overwatch but a strange remake. In the dream, was crying about breaking my streak. 

Day 3
remembering things about video games I haven't touched in a year (injustice2 when talking about batman)

Day 4
Another dream about breaking my streak, but with hearthstone.
 

[Playing Multiplayer Games "Alone"]

Thank but I'm not as concerned about whether I can regulate it (hopefully I can, i realize thats kinda the point). but if/when regulation is achieved I guess I'm asking how to get people to play with me or find people who want to 

[Playing Multiplayer Games "Alone"]

Something that has been a big source of addiction yet simultaneously connection is Overwatch. It's a game notoriously team-based unless you just play free-for-all like I have been. However, I've had lots of joyful and/or heart-felt conversations with friends and strangers while moving the payload and such. I won't argue that those same experiences can be found outside the game. In fact, I'm still trying to figure out a straightforward question rather than asking for justification in playing a game based on the fact that it's "with other people."

While it doesn't take much to find people who want to talk in the game, the times where I drone on and seriously don't feel like I'm getting anything out of the game is all too easy. For better or worse, hardly any if any of my real life friends have been available to play games. In addition to queuing with randoms in MOBAs,The growing list of free battle royale games that you can play solo or with a team makes trying to get #1 even lonelier. I haven't done a full 90- day detox yet, still going through the video lessons, but when I am in a good place to be playing games again...

What should I do to make sure I'm engaging with people I play with?

To help add context, let me list some of the excuses I make when I play team games alone or without talking to my team.

1. My friends don't play: Whether I ask them or not, a lot of my friends from real life are too busy or uninterested.
2. I can't have good team work with strangers: It's mostly a toss up but I usually assume the people who win the most are people who work together on a regular basis.
3. Most people don't even talk: Depending on the game, lot of people on MOBAs or battle royales don't have a mic or don't listen to those who do.

If you think playing multiplayer games to interact with other can be worthwhile, let me know what about my mindset could be different.

If you are of the opinion that multiplayer games can be just as unhealthy as solo rpgs or some other opinion between the two, please let me know your reasoning as well. 

Again, haven't gotten far into the respawn for gamers guide so maybe I just need to keep watching, figured it was worth asking anyway.

Thanks,
Kendall "PurpleBot" Stauffer

[Seeking More]

Hello,

My name is Kendall, I am a senior graphic design student of the University of Valley Forge. I living happily with my generous parents and my dog. I'm technically still employed as a grill cook at a local buffet. It wasn't a direct result of too much gaming that caused me to be laid off, but had I been better rested, it may not have happened.

I may not struggle with video games nearly as much as the average person here and am already far more successful than a lot of people on the autism spectrum (which I am), but I still am looking to stop playing video games as much as I have been. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome at the age of 16. I've been going to a behavioral therapist on a regular basis ever since, which has been a huge help. However, as I wrap up my final year of college, which I'm of course very proud of, I'm scared about how I will function in the real world. 

For a long time, it wasn't a huge issue. I would come home after work or school to play a couple hours of games, sometimes by myself, sometimes with friends. I was able to keep up with most of my homework and chores and had money and time left over to hang out with friends on the weekend where we would also play games together. For various reasons, I haven't been able to keep in touch with most of them and the temptation to backslide into a gaming coma and spend more money on gaming is tempting me. I want to be able to manage my time well now more than ever.

As a graphic designer, I love making artwork. In fact, I attribute a lot of my passion for art to video games and the piles of fan art I made as a kid. But I can't produce and consume content at the same rate without feeling torn one way or the other and it's mostly been consuming. 

I decided to make an investment and bought access to the video lectures for gamequitters because that's how I learn best. It definitely feels ironic given how much money and time I need to finish the schooling I'm already in but I am dedicated to being free to not play.

Love,
Kendall Stauffer