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About simmsjt

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  1. Well I've found that I can manage it but its a constant drain on my will power to do so. I also constantly think about it when im not gaming. I am drawn to gaming for escapism, socializing, and a sense of accomplishment. I would like to be able to live a full life and just have gaming as a hobby but I don't think its realistic with the intensity of my cravings. I went back to gaming because I thought I could handle but I was wrong. I only played 2 hours a day for the past month compared to the 8 hours a day from a year ago. But it still such a drain on my life. Maybe things will be different in the future. I want to accomplish the 90 day detox again to see how things feel at that point. I don't really feel happy about it but I recognize that failing is a part of learning to succeed. I'm also in kinda of a weird point in my life. I'm in an accelerated school program right now. I spend 12 hours a day seven days a week in class or doing homework but I only have 2 months of that left. Once I graduate I will have a lot less stress and more free time. Based on the jobs in my local area I should be able to find employment within a month of graduation. Money is a big stressor and trigger for addictive behaviors for me. Once I find a job the monetary stress should start to lessen as well. I think once I am employed I may look into trying to integrate it again as my life situation is a lot different. But we will see. I hope you can take something from this I know its kinda rambling on im about to go to bed so im a little tired.
  2. 11/30/17 The hardest part is the loneliness. I find the cravings are only really bad when im home alone. I don't have any friend outside of school so weekends and evenings are hard to stay on track.
  3. 11/28/17 Day 2 doing ok because class is keeping me busy. I was feeling pretty bad last night but I went for . a walk with my dad and that helped.
  4. Thank you @Laney it is good to know other people have a similar issue.
  5. After 5 months without games I relapsed again and have been playing for the past 3 months. I really wanted to play in moderation. I was successful in that effort. I have only been playing 2 hours a day during the past months. However, it takes so much of my willpower and headspace to accomplish that. I hate that when I'm not gaming I constantly think about gaming. I'm going to start another 90 day detox and evaluate how I want to move forward after that. This marks day one. Last night I put my gaming PC up in storage and I uninstalled all the games on my phone. I know last time I abstained it wouldn't have been possible without the people I met through this community. Most of the people I used for support in the past have moved on with there lives. I'm hoping I can meet new people so that we can support each other. 11/28/17
  6. Thanks for the advice. I guess anxiety has never been something I've thought I could fix. It's always been something that I've delt with my whole life. I've been going to counseling it has helped in many areas but not when it comes to the anxiety. I'll look into Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy @HappyCat. Thank you for your kind words @giblets. Maybe I am being to hard on myself.
  7. Just curious how other people deal with anxiety? The biggest appeal to gaming for me is anxiety management. If I get really anxious I can play for a few hours and it will go away for awhile. I thought maybe it was games that were causing it. But after going 4 months without gaming I was still experiencing it and that's what drew me back into gaming.
  8. Great job so far man! keep up the good work!!!
  9. 8/22/2017 Day's without gaming: 14 Did good today.
  10. simmsjt

    I'm back...

    Thank you both. I really appreciate the words of encouragement.
  11. 8/21/2017 Day's without gaming: 13 Thanks for the kind words everyone. Today was a lot easier as I was traveling. About to go spend time with a friend who is a big gamer so hopefully I can avoid the temptation while i'm over there.
  12. 8/20/2017 Day's without gaming: 12 Back again unfortunately. Man it sucks I was doing so well. I thought I could handle a little light gaming that was a mistake. I'm trying to move forward in life so I need to quit again. Need to reconnect with people on here. It's hard going through stuff alone. I am grateful for: 1. My father 2. Water 3. having a bed Good things that happened to me today: 1. Made some money selling old things on craigslist 2. Got to eat breakfast with my family at a diner 3. I posted on here!
  13. simmsjt

    I'm back...

    I'm honestly embarrassed to be writing this. I was doing really well for about a month after I finished my first 90 day detox. But I started wondering if maybe it would be ok to play a little bit. At first it wasn't bad I'd just play for an hour a day no big deal. But then my life got stressful and I started using the games for my classic escapism. I ended up gaming for about 60 hours a week on average. I really want to move forward with my life but I keep getting sucked into games. I'm enrolling in school which start in September. I'm moving up to Colorado for school and I'm super worried that I'm going to fail out again because of gaming. I just quit again. It's been about 12 days without gaming. Any words of encouragement would be appreciated. Thanks for letting me vent yall.
  14. Welcome we are all super excited you have taken another step on your journey. Keep up the great work!