Hey, hey, hey, don't give up homie! You don't want to feel the pain of hitting the bottom again, do you? I don't want to and here's why I'm reading your journal and many others. This is why I'm spending a lot of time outside. This is why I'm focused on support. If you were a gamer, that means YOU'RE NOT LAZY! It's not only my opinion, just look @Cam Adair made a special video for you: So, he put an effort to make a video for you, and you want to give up on that and do nothing! Hell no! I dare you do translate this video above into your native tongue. This will give you at least SOMETHING to do. This is serious, you know, a quest (I mean, not @Quest, but quest, a mission) from Mad Pharmacist. Once you achieve it you can continue this path. I have some more tasks for you, but start with this, man! Keep it up and never lose hope! Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
Nice table! It's gives you a lot of information about yourself! Good place to be more aware About fruit: Remember that some fruit are not commonly known as fruit e.g. tomato is a fruit (a berry, specifically ) and some of them are difficult to obtain like durian. So for me it looks like one of the biggest challenge in the entire community! You can place here some photos of your backyard so you'll feel more motivated to take an action and create it! Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
Heyyy Quest! I read your entry and I have to say, that you're still on the good road! I mean, 1 hour spent on procrastination sometimes happens to everyone. Don't blame yourself for that and just move forward. You said that Discord community keeps you accountable. One of the best way I know to keep yourself accountable is to have an accountability partner. It's nice you have apps to prevent you from overusing Internet. That's important in the beggining. Also I really like Mazury! You're probably from mountainous part of Poland if you go there like Bieszczady. Am I right?
As @puckspock said, some days are just worse than others. You're just a human not a robot so you have right to have worse days. Remember about that, you can't be happy 100% of the time it's physiologically impossible! Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
I'm solemnly swear that I'm up to good Day #1831 Hell yea, today's physiology was a tough one. However, I did my best and I'm just proud of myself. So, today I'm gonna participate in community activity more, although I still need some time to face next exam on Monday! Mischief managed.
Day 17/90. Also 22/22/3 soda porn fap. I'm surviving but it was a rough night. My sleep schedule is weird now. I typically fall asleep around 9:30-10 and I sleep on the couch in the living room where my Mom is. If I tried the bedroom, I'd get hit by anxiety, loneliness, or racing thoughts. I usually wake up somewhere between 11pm-1:30am, stagger into the bedroom and sleep for a few more hours since I'm nice and tired. Last night didn't work out. I slept on the couch until 1:30am but when I went to bed, I just couldn't get back to sleep. I tossed and turned all night long. I even went back to the couch but that didn't help. So about 4 hours of real sleep sigh. I think part of it is the fapping. I'm back to day 3 without it and this was my last real source of dopamine hits. I think some of those withdrawal symptoms are coming back since I've closed that part off. I can't go back because I do not want to go through this again. I do not want to sleep on the couch forever. In brighter news I dled the Duolingo app and was studying a little German last night. That was fun. I took years of it in college. There's a couple of native German speakers at work that I was talking to yesterday and trying to remember some of my old phrases. You talk to people more without headphones I notice. I got more compliments from my boss and a coworker on how slimmer I looked. That makes it all worth it right there. All the anxiety I'm experiencing is worth it if I transform myself
Day 42 Hay Family things are going really really well day 42(YAH IM SO PROUD) i just read "the con pound effect"and "go-Giver" so no games and been pushing to have many wonderful; experiences and grateful for all the wonderful souls am meeting on my journey the connection is so real and the friends Ive created and healthy relationships Ive wanted are here which i never imagined, Ive realized how much i have to give to the world and i do feel and awakening,Its thx to my inspiring friends David,Nadia,Cruez, and Amanda I'm happy to say i trust them SO MUCH and cane myself and i feel so courageous around them we love to dance and when we go anywhere we addd SO MUCH energy to any event, I'm learning to how to do positive activities at the right time am on page 40 of the packet and learning to be more proactive, Ive started acro yoga which is 1 or 2 times a week i've been reading and consistently,traveling,adventuring and doing my savers consistently, i live at our squad house with a group of friends seeking new experiences and saving up to be independent, my car just broke down and will be selling it since the engine died,since this i got a bike. I love how everyone different and learning to set boundaries hold people accountable and learning to dissociate with people and influence the influences around me and i realized i am SO fortunate to have this community you all inspire me and I appreciate that, i work at my bros property which is cool we do a lot of stuff with. I been having a lot of fun going to event giving FREE HUGS to the world and just giving what i can, that being compliments, a huge that feels like forever or doing things like helping out any way i can giving gifts or spending quality time with the friends, So back to my first post and my Properties---JOB Today i printed out resumes to find a legit sales job looked into build.com sunpower and got a typing program to improve my skills for build.com JOB-i been working for my bro which is 100$ a day that cool 8-12 hours of work i work my best and i really appreciate he feeds me. HARD ASS WORK I TELL YOU but you feel SO GOOD, Hard Labor work and managing plants, if you only new;) INDEPENDENCE- So in a way i did Move out i have not been home at all so no internet. HEALTH- I been mediating more my mental health is great and emotional health its getting better and better everyday i do get a little anxious about the future, been biking riding to one mile working to get a PC, so i can start my side business sorta am in a way LOL but cant talk about it not really a side business. I have BIG plans and being the connector us my plan. Being going out tot dance alot which is <3 <3 <3 ive found my flow you can see who the courageous souls are, something about free huges has help me connect with man MANY people. OVERALL i do plan to be big here in Chico, reading a workout book now BIGGER LEANER STRONGER to get healthier everyday and grow the confidence and self-esteem. I need help figuring out a time to do cams packet more consistent but overall im growing everyday towards being my best Verizon;) of myself, I do want structure in my life and more consistency with my meals and a solid home, Im working towards all that and making better life descions and am so greatful for my freinds at the same time i will take any constructive criticism for you all to grow. Being aware of what were influencing ourselves with has really been on my mind. OFF TO TAKE MORE masssive action: trap life + being a positive person in the world
This day wasn't good for me either. I woke up late and spent the whole morning and noon in bed mindlessly browsing my phone. I left my house at 16 just to go get a haircut and get home shortly after so I can mow my lawn and go back to browsing. At least I was browsing some educational stuff this evening. I think that leaving Discord community before finishing my detox for even as short time as it may seem was bad for me, since my brain still is not fully rewired and I need advices and keep myself accountable just by chatting with this community.
I finally got around to making my list of activities from the video for day #2. Here it is... subject to change Active: Swimming, Running, Calisthenics, Dancing, Hiking, Camping Resting: Reading, Board Games, Meditation, Yard Work Creative: Visual Art, Writing, Cooking, Learning Saxaphone Social: Dancing, Writing Group, Farmer's Market Skill: Technology/Business University, Duolingo, Bonus: Part-time job (looking next week)
Lol. I'm trying. Finally starting to see some results. I'm starting to get an inkling that I can't feel things on my own. I have to get out of the house, and be near other people to feel. Maybe that's because my real passion is working with others... That has a ring of truth to it for me.
In an unrelated topic, I read @Cam Adair's instructions on an accountability partner and made a couple of posts to people who were looking for someone. In Cam's post, he said that accountability partners were supposed to help others not play video games. When I read that it was like I got hit in the face. This is all about quitting video games, but the last couple of days haven't been that at all for me, it's been about just improving my life in every way I can. Video Games was like an old and out of date topic in my head. That was a pretty awesome moment
Hey Giblets, I know you're way ahead of me at this point, but I'd be down to help you. I've wanted to do a triathlon for many many years, and hopefully we can help each other out for those fitness races. Hope all is well for you as always man!
Hey Hassan, A lot of what you described fits me as well. I'm from Salt Lake City, UT, I have a family, I'm working on a rigorous technical bachelors degree, I have a family (wife & 6 year old daughter), and I'll be job searching within a week or two. I'm also trying to get into better shape. I'm 6'3", 230 lbs, and I feel like my body is weak and I can't do many of the things I wish I could do. Plus I have a condition that makes my joints weak if I don't keep the muscles around them strong.
I really like cooking and eating healthy, but in the last 60 days I feel like I've only made a homecooked meal a few times. I want to get closer to making a tasty and healthy meal about 4-5 times a week, using good products in my food, and not eating out. My exercise goal is to tone up my body and get some good strength throughout. My weight goal would probably be about 240 from an increase in muscle. If what I said sounds like what you're looking for, send me a message and we'll figure out how to keep in contact.
I've been tinkering with my life goals as well so this is a great exercise, Shine. I'm not as passionate about fruit, hehe, but it's good to find what you truly want in life. I'm still working on it. Btw, you have the cutest avatar on the forum. 😉
Level Up: Game Free Day 9 Today... is good I started off the day thinking I would go to my university and start getting in the mindset for Monday when my classes start. Instead, I took a tour of a new building on a nearby campus that's all about entrepreneurship. IT WAS AWESOME! So freaking cool to finally see this building that I've been looking forward to for years. It was everything that I had expected from following it and more! I didn't even know I was going to go, but my wife told me that it's what they were doing for her work before their board meeting. No clue she was going, but last second I drove her to work and piggy backed on the tour. It was absolutely wonderful. I FELT awake and excited for the first time in a very long time. My god, it was so nice to actually feel something again. I think part of it was because it was something I was really interested in, but also the fact that it was in the morning, with other people I knew and respected, and I didn't lie to myself about what was exciting to me. I started making some great scenarios in my head when the tour lady said "designers". I threw up about 6 different scenarios in my head of how I might be able to integrate myself into this entrepreneurial process. Later, when I got home. I worked on the conceptual design for a multi-peace art project I'm working on, took a nap, called a friend, set up a volunteer opportunity for myself in the weekend, and I took a run! I haven't exercised in months, but it was very nice, and my body feels great now. Now lunch and this forum. Later make a few phone calls for adulting (boo adulting), later later looking at apartments to move to and hopefully make some appointments for my family to see them tonight. Overall, seems like a pretty kick ass day to me! WOOOO!!!!! First breakthrough, HELL YEAH!
Here here man. Since I don't have my masks anymore, I feel like I'm kind of a blank slate. That is both terrifying and exciting! Since there's nothing there, I'm having to re-engineer my personality and create foundations for the rest of myself to be built on. That's the scary part. But the part that makes me eager is the part where I get to create myself as I see fit without exterior influences that I was unaware of when I did this growing up naturally.
Hey Ben. Thanks for sharing. It's normal to feel that way, but I want to challenge you to do something DIFFERENT. Instead of withdrawing and isolating yourself like you normally do in these situations, instead of hiding away and only updating once a week, post more, use this as a way to get things off your chest and to share more openly. When you're making a change like this, you want to be skeptical of the NORMAL WAYS that you respond to things, because those are the ways that have led you to the position you find yourself in now. So you actually have to almost do the opposite - at least to try it. Read Daring Greatly by Brene Brown - it will help a lot. Also, these videos can help: How to Stop Agonizing over the Little Things - https://youtu.be/_RDbLXK12W8How To Deal With Stress Without Gaming - https://youtu.be/L2231TLb1A4
5 Day Today it was very bad. I started watching some porn and other stupid things. I think that i am very lazy and comfortable person. Every day i must have schedule or goals or whatever but worst is do nothing. If you do nothing you feel bad and than you make stupid decisions which later lead to regret and pain. Gosh I know what to do but despite of that im making nothing. Am i that stupid ? Ohh man...