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Question of the week: What's your favourite quote?

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  1. Today
  2. Like with songs, movies and dishes, I refuse to have only a single fav quote. "Only when mosquito lands on crotch is that men learn to solve problem without violence" - Unknown "Your mind is a bit like soup, it has to be stirred up all the time and then interesting vegetables float to the surface and so on and you have new ideas. If you just sit there, it all stagnates and gets boring." - Dr. Martyn Poliakoff "Always look on the bright side of life" - Eric Idle
  3. Should try harder Yesterday I missed my daily entry. Day was quite busy, but not really productive, and at the evening I went to a ballet presentation with GF, Got home late and was too tired, didn't bother to fire the notebook just to write the entry, though I probably should have. Habits die pretty quickly if you let them, I don't want to let this one go. Today was fine, I guess, did some stuff on my thesis, watched a movie with GF... an overall nice Sunday. But I really, really need to be more productive. I know, it's only one month out of gaming, I have to find myself and all of that, but I feel it's upon me to try harder, too. Be mindful of my plans, don't be too carefree as I'm used too, really put myself into it. I want it badly, I know I'm able to do a good work, but time is against me. i cant afford to lose any more of it, as I have lost plenty already. Focus and effort to keep going, and onwards we go! Edit: shout out to @Ikar, thanks for the visit, mate. Yes, keep your backups updated, electronics are unpredictable and will let you down sooner or later. Standalone backups are even better than the cloud.
  4. Day 21: May 26, 2019 3 full weeks without video games. Didn't think it would be this easy to quit gaming. I think taking a few days preparing for the detox before I started was the key to early success. I was able to make it thru most of Respawn before day 1 which prepared me greatly. I took a 3 week vacation two years ago and that's the longest I've ever gone without video games.. so I think like 3-4 more days without games and it will be my longest streak of all time. I spent a few hours at a family bday party today where I definitely ate too much. I kind of let myself get away with too much today because I've been planning for days to change my routines greatly starting tomorrow. I broke my PMO streak today.. I don't care too much because I'm going to start new streaks tomorrow. I could have avoided it pretty easily.. I kinda chose to do it anyway.. won't happen again. Didn't hit the gym today. That makes 17/21 for the past 21 days. Pretty impressive regardless. So how are things going to be different starting tomorrow? I spent a decent chunk of today planning and preparing for how to be successful and reach top performer level. Starting tomorrow I'm implementing a 100 pushups a day challenge for at least the next 30 days. I'll be going water only as well for at least 30 days. I've set up a google calendar where I've scheduled my week. I've fit in wake up times, gym sessions, and when to eat each meal so far. I've got it synced to my phone with reminders so this should be a powerful tool to help keep me on track! I was super skeptical and dismissive of the idea of keeping a daily or weekly schedule for as long as I can remember, but I watched some YouTube stuff today on how to use google calendar to plan and be successful and it kind of sold me. I think this will play a big part in my success moving forward. I also officially accepted the job offer. So I have one more week of total freedom before I start my new job as the Junior Network Administrator. Really looking forward to it. Life will start getting real hectic that week but I'm confident with my new scheduling strategies and my discipline I will be successful. Looking forward to tomorrow. 21 days gaming free
  5. Yesterday
  6. Day 5 | Focus: 35% | Pomodoros: 18 + CGAA OH THANK GOD. I finally found the source of a mysterious bug that has been holding my thesis project prisoner. I won't even say how long it took me, I'll just say that it's not worth measuring in hours. I can't even count that high. Why did the counter jump from 6 to 5? Because on day 0, I got rid of overwatch and committed to the detox again, BUT I kept a short single-player game that I wanted to finish for easy closure, so I did that in the first two days, ~4 hours each. Now that I'm feeling very confident about this detox run, I want it to be clean. It still doesn't include videos, but I have to take it one step at a time. I'm still baffled and proud at the same time of not gaming during a weekend for the first time in 2019! Let's gooooo..! @karabas Yep that's exactly why. There are sometimes in-person meetings for US east and west coast, but not much in my city. As a citizen of the EU, I feel like a 2nd-class citizen of the world, which is pretty solid, but I still get jealous of all the opportunities in the US. The more I learn, especially about finance, the more privilege that I don't have I see. Anyways, more awareness about gaming addiction is desperately needed.
  7. Day 63 26.05.19 Gratitude journal Today I am grateful for it being a nice day. One amazing thing that happened/I did today ---- Workout/run more than 16k steps Meditation 10 min guided meditation in the morning 20 min guided meditation in the evening Visualisation and daily affirmation a bit affirmation and visualisation Reading (0hours of studying for the next exam today) sadly had no time for my regular Spanish session or studying, but read and learnt quite a bit (just not for my next exam 😞 ) my wake-up time 8:20 (weekend) Weekly Goal(s) continue with miracle morning routine, study at between 4 and 8hours per day, reduce my screen time to less than 2hours, meditate half an hour every day, have at least 2 perfect days next week Monthly Goal to study a lot for my exams, be more grateful for everything in life, find the joy of living in the moment, think hard about my values and what kind of person I want to be, start the miracle morning 1 month challenge anew 3 Month Goal getting my degree or getting it nearly done so that at least at the end of July I have it in my hands, having a really productive life, living my life so that I am proud of it What went well today: (NF:2/NW:0/NS:0) had a great family gathering and lots of moving around What I could have done to make my day better but it came at cost of not having any time for myself other than meditation and had no time to study, opened my webnovels on reflex and ate cake at home so again back to 0 with these 2 cravings What I will do differently tomorrow/What I have planned for tomorrow: wake up earlier, meditate for 30min, study 4hours, go to university, have another perfect day Weekly summary, thoughts and improvements for the future I think the reasons for my lack of productivity and discipline are that I stayed too much in my room and also did had wake up real early regularly so for the next week I will change this and hopefully I will be back on track
  8. Agreed! I'd also work on developing my career/work first if it's already your focus, rather than to get tangled up in a new relationship and try to work out an extra thing. Taking care of yourself first is the top priority. Speaking of which, the end of my past relationship was the impulse that got me here on this forum after facing some harsh truth! It depends on who your parents are. My parents also got shaken when I quit my day job. What they wanted me to be was to be safe and you are fairly safe in a day job. It's what they do too, so I can't blame them for that. I want some adventure in my life first though!
  9. I just feel so angry because I turned away my dream home for this and I'm too depressed here to do my passion projects now. I'm just sitting in bed crying like an asshole and once I'm done being sad I'll get so angry that I smash everything in sight like a lunatic. I'm so dumb for giving everything up. I can't even do it now. People are shit and life is terrible. It's this tease that one day you'll be happy and that one day doesn't exist.
  10. Day 26 gone to bed: 23.20 woke up: 08.30 Fuck me! I relapsed in "NoFap" pretty hard. Watched some porn and regret it now. I feel down and I hope I get back to how it was before tomorrow, when school gives me back some routine and stuff to do. I chilled many hours today, watched Youtube and never got anything done until 21.00. Now I've done all my homework. I still need to learn for my physics exam. I'm disappointed by myself. I'm grateful for: church service and worship in the morning cleaning my room support from a women in church for my relationship-problems with my female friend
  11. Ikar

    Ikar's Diary

    I forgot to mention I voted yesterday in the EU elections, so that took me an hour as well. Day 36: I got up pretty late, as a result of yesterday's meetup. I got some files together for the exam and did Russian. Brother came for lunch and after that I drove my family by car to a nearby village for a walk. I returned home with the car, watched some JP on addiction, did a bit of self-authoring and discussed women yet again with a Romanian friend of mine. I played some Scrabble and worked out in the evening and played a bit of basketball with some random guys that joined me. I know I slacked this weekend on whatever I wanted to do, so I'll pick up on that tomorrow. I'll go on a short bike trip and get my errands done tomorrow. @Ikar: clean car, photo, flight ticket, duo, read 1 page, send letter x 2, exam, bike trip, groceries
  12. Yeah this is BS. If that were true, addicts would never follow their passions after recovery. Just putting it out there: sometimes, due to their own low self-esteem, parents subconsciously don't want their children to succeed and/or leave home.
  13. I've got way too much of them. But a load of them are in St John's Gospel. "Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home in them." (Jesus in John 14) It's just fabulous we can have God inhabiting our soul by obeying him.
  14. I'm struggling a lot recently. My mother is trying to get me to make her life better and do things so she feels better when I need the help. Whenever I tell her about the problems I'm having and would like to discuss them she starts fidgeting and getting stressed out. Within 10 minutes she says I talk like my father and leaves the room to go have a cigarette. If she ends up staying in the house to talk then she completely sidetracks from any advice she's giving me. She'll give me advice for 5 minutes and then ramble about something unrelated and then start talking about shit she needs to talk about. I get angry and ask what the point of the conversation was and she realizes it has nothing to do with why we originally spoke. I'm in a fragile spot because I just gave my career away to attempt to write a cartoon and create an online media business for myself and it's hard to do this when she's being so fucking annoying to be around. It's crushing me. She picks fights, doesn't communicate with me at all, and makes me feel like I'm being an asshole. I end up feeling guilty about everything because she's letting me live here for free, paying for groceries, and allowing me to take my time with all of this. But at the same time the emotional investment is not worth it because of how stressful these living situations are on weekends. I want to write or take an online class and she picks a fight with me saying "it's beautiful out and I want to walk the beach! I don't want to sit around inside all day." This makes me feel like a loser for staying inside to work on something I want to work on. So now I'm starting to get depressed and sad because I'm not living the typical "fear of missing out" style of life where we have to spend the whole day outside and take pictures because this is living yay!!!!!! Fuck that. I can do that some days, but other days I need to be constructive. I need to create things. I want to do something on my own some days. I don't want to go back to a career I literally just gave up. But living here has been such a disaster and it's turning out to be exactly what I feared. I'd quit my job and then get into arguments here and have to go back. I haven't even written a single fucking line in my cartoon because of this drama. I'm also tired of people saying "if you're not working on it then you don't want to do it". I'm too afraid to start working on these things because my self esteem is low. I have been working so hard to develop my self esteem over the past few months and between work dwindling down my life and my home life being so turbulent I just want to escape. It's a miracle I haven't been watching porn 10 times per day and trying to play RuneScape. Every day I just sit and think I should have bought that fucking house and just lived for the weekends. But I don't want to do that. I don't want the ordinary life. I just want to do something special and be special because I know I can be special and not special needs. My mind is everywhere right now and my mom doesn't see it at all.
  15. CGAA sounds very interesting. I didn't know it even existed. The only thing I wish is that it would be in person, but I'm guessing there aren't enough people for that... too few realize that they're addicted or that it's harming their lives.
  16. Day 1/120 |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| No phone in washroom 1/120 20 mins of Qur'an 1/120 My first day was full of forgetfulness. I forgetfully watched some videos on a news website and forgot to read Qur'an until later in the day. I'm still counting this as a day, because overall I didn't intentionally waste time on vids and habits take time to form. Feeling good so far. Not a lot of desire to watch anything. Thanks man!
  17. Eyyy! I love seeing someone else here who also does game. I only read the last entry, but I can relate to being good in the past and then losing all social skills due to gaming and bad mental health, then trying to get back into it. Good luck!
  18. Lol just kidding, just in case anyone believed me. I'm 25 and from the UK. I'm tired of escaping life. I just want to live. Looking forward to interacting with y'all 🙂
  19. Day 28 (28 day streak) 100% gaming and gaming-content free. 4 weeks! Yesterday was a roller coaster. Started out the day well, got to the gym. Cleaned up a bit. Learned a bit more about fashion and bought some clothes. And then the feelings hit. Usually around 7 PM on a Saturday or Friday (if I'm not at the gym or completely wiped) I get this massive sense of dread, guilt, and usually a headache too. This is usually the nadir of my week as I realize how much I messed up my life in so many different areas, especially socially. This exact same pattern happened yesterday, and I started to numb myself with some of the sites I haven't blocked on my phone, which wasn't particularly satisfying relative to games. Around 9 PM I started to reason with myself (well you could still go out...but no! It's too late now! It will be too crowded when you get there, etc., etc.). Eventually I basically said "screw it," pulled myself together for a bit, and went out. My only goal, instead of walking past like last week, was to go in regardless, have a beer, and leave. I did not wait in the car nearly as long, and I kind of had an edge, so I didn't really feel those negative emotions at the same point from last week. And you know what I did when I got to the bar--I kept my word. I was much happier when I left, as I had started to return to facing my fears. I know this may sound insignificant to some, but if you knew me a few years ago, this is a big deal. Also, given that my confidence shattered out of nowhere over the past few months, this was a nice baby step in the right direction. I had been numbing myself watching esports for the first half of this year, so this was a nice change. I still have room to get to where I peaked last year, where I was going to busy clubs by myself and talking to women, but that will come with time. Ideally, I just want to be so comfortable with myself that I can start conversations with strangers in random places with no problem. I just want to keep this momentum up and keep facing my fears. I can't keep staying where I am at.
  20. I agree with this. You've completed 90 days and beyond and I think you've earned the right to attempt to rehabilitate yourself and to be able to play in moderation. But I would advise to be careful and to be extremely mindful of how you feel in your body as well as in your mind while you do it. You want to not feel negative emotions towards this old hobby, which will be difficult because it's not just a 'hobby'. You had an obsessive/compulsive behavior towards it and it needs to be treated differently. As part of quitting, many addicts create negative affiliations to it, because it's easier to give up something you hate than to give up something you love. If you want to go back to loving, you have to be very strategic to not slip back to the old destructive behaviors. But I believe it's possible. ... IMHO 😄
  21. You played paintball with an injured foot? Woah. I only played it two times but absolutely loved it. Even despite getting sweaty, which is something I despise haha. I also miss role playing games. It's such an amazing hobby, but hard to find the right people, the right place and the right time simultaneously.
  22. Hi Joyone, I think you could provide a good insight into the game design aspects of fortnite that made it so addictive. Do you mind if I ask you some questions? I’m doing a presentation at the international conference of behavioural addictions with cam in about 3 weeks in japan. Thanks in Advance kim
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