"Be open to all outcomes, but attached to none."

Activity Stream

Activity Stream

  1. LuminousBean added a post in a topic The mountains are calling...   

    Keep it up! I enjoy seeing your progress.  I've also been inspired by your reminders to yourself on your different goals for time ranges.
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  2. LuminousBean added a post in a topic The Cave You Fear To Enter Holds the Treasure You Seek   

    @NewComer thanks for the reply.  I'll take that into consideration--it is a good way also to think of the 'closing a chapter' on that part of life.
    5 Days Game Free
    5AM Wakeup: 5:20, so not quite my goal.  Definitely wouldn't have made it through the last two days without significant coffee.
    Meditation: 15 + 10 (felt my head drooping at the end of the afternoon session)
    Mind: Continuing 3rd Hitchiker's Guide book, listened to a few podcasts (TED Radio Hour, the episode wasn't great).  More from The Willpower Instinct.  Plan to revive Duolingo by the end of the week to have my Spanish fluency feeling stronger.
    Body:  8.25 miles today between walking dog with gf to work, working, and walking dog this evening.  Feet hurt!  But still not the same as lifting or BJJ.  Dreading the deload after a week and a half.
    Food: Solid slow carb breakfast & dinner.  Had a coworker cook lunch for me, which had some grease & carbs, but the fact that it was the exception today makes that alright.
    Notes: No game cravings really today.  1 Beer, 7%.  Putting into effect some of the tips from The Willpower Instinct.  Meditation is the main low-hanging fruit, so I have to try some of the other strategies.  I have to start thinking of writing as an "I want..." and an "I will..." otherwise I will keep brushing it aside.  Gf is working 70 hour weeks, which is making basic maintenance of the apartment & dog more burdensome, but I know I can get more done if I use my time well.
    I noticed another journal had short term, medium term, and long term goals that he reposted each day.  I like that idea, and am mulling it over.  My worry is I want to be a person of my word.  I have plenty of friends and know tons of people who have grand visions and ideas of what they want to do, who never even undertake one of their boasts.  I'll keep it short and adjust over time if it doesn't work out.
    Short Term  (week)
    Lock down scheduling of time, specifically for: Lifting (3xweek), writing (40 min daily), sleeping (5am wakeup, supported by being more responsible/firm with bed time)
    Schedule test for work.
    Mid Term
    Get Resume together for job applications and moving cities
    Brush up on espanol
    File taxes
    Get back into surfing
    Long Term
    Complete draft, edit, send out novel for consideration
    Push beyond comfort zone, get outside

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  3. Stercus accidit added a post in a topic Nie wiem... 18 latek z niską samooceną xD kurwa raczej kolejne wcielenie leniwca z wyrzutami sumienia   

    Masz rację w 100%.
    Przyznam, mam z tym wszystkim problem, także z samym sobą. Mam tendencję do porównywania osób które znam. Trochę takie selekcjonowanie kto jest wart mojej uwagi, a kto nie. Nie robię tego na pierwszy rzut oka. Jednak nie jestem usatysfakcjonowany tym jakich ludzi poznałem tutaj. Nie możemy znaleźć wspólnego języka haha.
    To wszystko potęgują jeszcze inne zainteresowania i cele w życiu. Dlatego też najlepiej doagaduję się z ludźmi z klasy wyżej... Czyli tak na prawdę mam jedną osobę z którą można byłoby się powłóczyć :D. Tutaj z kolei nasze plany dnia nie za bardzo do siebie pasują (tak prawdopodobnie robię za dużo wymówek).

    Kontakt z ludźmi w US daje mi poczucie, że to nie to samo co było w Polsce.  Nie ma tu takiej osoby jak moi dwaj przyjaciele Janusz i Arab. Nie dziwię się, ze nikt ich nie potrafi zastąpić, ale chciałbym żeby ktoś taki na codzień tutaj był, rówieśnik z którym motywujemy się nawzajem i rozumiemy na "wyższej płaszczyźnie".

    Z innej beczki. 

    Brak mi jakiejkolwiek motywacji do działania, zaraz po powrocie ze szkoły. Nie moge się zmusić do niczego przez kolejne 3 godziny, a do normalnej nauki/pracy zabieram się dopiero o 20:00. Często zdaza się też, że biorę 2 - godzinną drzemkę i nie sposób jest mnie obudzić wcześniej. 

    Dalej nie posprzątałem w pokoju, ale coś tam zacząłem  ćwiczyć anglieski.

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  4. Simms added a post in a topic The mountains are calling...   

    Day #30 - Tuesday
    1/3 of the way through this detox. Amazing progress so far. - Rough it's the busiest time of the year at work. I'm enjoying the challenge for the most part.
    For @Schwing, when I say "detail work" I mean the fussy difficult details in a report. I can throw together a 20 page report inside 2 hours. But making sure all the embedded excel cells are the right size, the dollar signs are perfectly aligned, capitalization of every account is correct. Those are the detail pieces down below the broad strokes that I struggle with. It frustrates me to fail at it over and over again. But seeing a finished product with all of these things properly taken care of, and the quality that inspires has helped motivate me to be better.
    Work went well. very little wasted time on mindless surfing. - Boxing was exhausting today. Both me and the GF are feeling run down so we took the afternoon off climbing.
    Gratitude journal
    GF for pushing to get our taxes done. All filed and out the door.
    One amazing thing that happened/I did today
    Filed the yearly T1. =p
    Boxing class!Reading + taking notes
    What went well today:
    Boxing - Chatting, playing with the dogs.
    What I could have done to make my day better:
    Gone for a walk when I was struggling in my head.
    Misc thoughts and plans:
    Made a good showing of a day that could have gone off the rails... agaiN! Keep it up through the week!
    Haven't even been looking at my monthly and 3-month goals. Need to think about that when I'm mindlessly surfing. I'm running out of time each day and that time I'm wasting could be used to read this and contemplate.
    Plan of action for Sunday: Re-read old journal posts... time to reflect.
    Weekly Goal(s) - Monday start
    Climb 2x, Stronglifts 3x - So far 1x stronglifts
    Journal daily - So far, so good.
    Track mood daily at least twice on Daylio: So far - 20 day streak - Back to feeling good.
    Monthly Goal
    Information gathering on buying a mountain bike. - Visit the bike shops in town. Friends gonna let me know when the first Demo days start up.
    Use Training for the New Alpinism to assist in shaping training plan. Got the book on my nightstand.  It's screaming to be used.
    NEW - Work hard to the end of April. - Be proud of what I've accomplished.
    3 Month Goal
    Top-rope a 5.12a successfully on the tall wall. Found a suitable project Sunday... will it be up long enough. /sigh
    NEW - Be in excellent condition for June mountain trip.
    Climb 1x technical, 1x non-technical 11,000er in the Canadian Rockies. May need to bump part of this out to 6 months.
    Outline novel. Chunking this. Creating manageable pieces relating to it in my weekly goals. - May need to evaluate if novel work is realistic with work and physical committments.
    Do an editing pass of one of my shorts. Dropping these two as not in line with my current goals and commitment level. To revisit later.
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  5. Stevec2283 added a post in a topic Time for something new   

    Day 23
    It was a pretty good day but I did have some moments throughout the day that I had the urge to game but I didn't. 
    For the past few days  I've been really lacking motivation in doing much of anything and I've been wasting a lot of time. I guess I'm just going through a bit of a rough patch right now, but I have to keep fighting through it. 
    Today I did watch a few gaming related videos but then I realized that it was only going to make things harder so I stopped after only 1 or 2 videos. YouTube is a good service but it also can waste a lot of time. 
    No matter how hard it is, I'll keep working towards my first goal which is to complete the 90 day detox.
    "Leave the Pixel World and Enter the Real World."
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  6. NewComer added a post in a topic The Cave You Fear To Enter Holds the Treasure You Seek   

    Hi, good job at going game free for three days. Do as you wish but here's a piece of advice, from what I learned here I came to this this conclusion that having the whole world keep you locked up and punch you every day so you can snap out of it, you won't quit gaming if you don't want to. The moment you decided to quit you should keep in mind that you acknowledged you spent so much time doing that and you can't change it unless you can change the whole time and space (I can't and not being able change the past bothered me), so now you're going to let it go and live the present. If you consider playing again for far future after second thoughts, it means you still haven't decided to fully quit them. This was a personal experience, since I have tried different ways to quit my addiction and in the end I failed because I was still thinking about what would happened if I upgraded my characters one more level or what if I played or tried the new update for only a brief moment. Only letting games completely go knowing I won't play again could help me to get through it. In short: 1. acknowledge your past 2. understand why you're quitting 3. let it go forever
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  7. lilX added a post in a topic Craig's Journal   

    I find that each attempt gets easier. Its like your next ascension get some perks and skills that gets carried over
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  8. magicalmerlinmark added a post in a topic Mindful in Montreal   

    1) finishing my project
    2) watching my friend playing Minecraft and feeling no urges
    3) going home to Canada tomorrow! 
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  9. lilX added a post in a topic Share your experiences and tips for friendship?   

    i joined a mma dojo for a few months now. i volunteered in their tournament, and had dinner with them later. The tournament was brutal. Lots of brain cells died that day. 
    They are really nice and training there keeps me from feeling lonely when my fiance is not around. 
    I agree with your tip! 
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  10. gankylosaurus added a post in a topic My Own Personal Bootcamp   

    Hey, man. Thanks. Besides being unemployed, I don't have a lot of negativity to share right now without getting too personal.
    Day 2
    Got everything done for the day. Well, that's not totally true. I said I'd rewrite that one chapter, but after looking at it again, I got a bit overwhelmed. I printed it out, made notes on it, then set it aside and wrote a whole new synopsis for the rewrite. I might end up typing up the new draft later, but I've got to give some time over to the girlfriend who will be home soon.
    I also finished that Udemy course on copy writing. It had some good insights, but it made it pretty clear that it's a really hard profession to get into and make profitable.
    Other than that, I'm sort of weaning myself off of caffeine finally. I did it by accident, though, because I wasn't paying attention and bought decaf coffee. I decided I'd still drink that then only get caffeinated coffee on campus when I need it. Having the decaf is good for me psychologically (I think) and yesterday I almost fell asleep in my first class without coffee. I've done this before, and I know how rough it is at first. But in the end, I'll be able to make it through a day without crashing. And if I do begin to crash, the caffeine will finally have an effect on me that it hasn't in a long time. Still, I'm exhausted right now.
    I'm thinking about getting back on my youtube channel again to talk about writing, but using my own writing as the source material. I wouldn't talk about the specifics of the story, but I would definitely talk about the issues I'm facing in the story in a broad sense, and follow up with how I fix them. Could be a good resource for other writers, and it could also be a good way for me to talk out some issues.
    See you tomorrow.
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  11. lilX added a post in a topic LilX Journal.   

    I didnt have much to do yesteday and fucked up by watching youtube and reddit, so now i have to pay up. 
    Speaking of reddit, the subreddit wholesome memes was fun to read. I was reading the latest reddit ama with Bill Gates and he said that success to him is defined by making those close to him happy, and as a bonus do something to make the world a better place. That really resonated with me. 
    Next challenge is the same thing for a week except i can listen to music on youtube, and the only caffeine i can consume is freshly brewed tea. 
    If i fail i give 100 dollars to the bill and melina gates foundation this time. 
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  12. Schwing added a post in a topic The Warrior's Infinite Opus   

    128 days
    Days porn free: 11
    Today I left my comfort zone by:
    Talking to 3 people I don't usually talk toRoutine:
    Get up 6:30 (8:30 weekend)BioenergeticsCold showerMeditation50 exp duolingoPhysical activityStudy or read 1 hourArt 1 hourGoal from yesterday done?:
    Well. I didn't exactly slay anything but I did it pretty damn good!
    Thoughts and Feelings:
    I woke up at 6:30 and was like "Nah fuck this" and went back to sleep.Went to a university conference thing. Plenty of opportunities to talk to random people. Didn't do it though.Came home worked out. Tried to lift 10kg each on dumbbells! Fuck my life. never trying that again.Went upstairs and did some art. Drew up some panels for a comic. Noice Tasks and achievements:
    Physical: workoutMental: studying, learning german, artSpiritual: cold showerWhat I am grateful for:
    Metal11 days nofap streak HAHA! I will do this!Access to educationhomemade pizzaWhat I have learnt from today:
    Stoner metal is pretty dope. No pun intended.Tomorrow I will leave my comfort zone by:
    Talk to 3 people I don't usually talk to.Goal for tomorrow:
    Look at university stuff
    Goal for the month:
    Finish all my coursework. Beat nofap
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  13. Shine Magical added a post in a topic Shine Magical's journal   

    Today is day 196 of no gaming -- 6 months, 15 days!
    Start date: 9/6/2016
    I passed my CFP Certification test today.
    I feel very empowered and happy!

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  14. NewComer added a post in a topic Hey, I am looking for advices to help me to stop playing video games :)   

    I think you should. Watching games, comedy, action, or most things that aren't about a research or study will have near affect for me, they might make me more greedy for games and if you watch them you might actually experiencing a less, near, or even higher gratification like games. So If you think one of Cam's movies motivate you to stay game free that's OK, but your twice a week counter strike video uploaded by an old timer is really not OK.
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  15. Marquess added a post in a topic [NSFW] Marquess' journal (Cute emo girls inside!)   

    Oh yeah. And it's funny because the popular perception of what a mental hospital looks like is the exact opposite of how things actually work. At least the program I'm in now - we're actually encouraged to go out at much as possible & spend weekends at home. Me and my parents were nearly pestered by several different therapists to let me spend weekends in my apartment at least, and I finally got permission to do so yesterday - thank fuck. Looking forward for a semblance of normality again.
    That said, it's normality that I'm finding overwhelming; today I spent about 5 hours just walking around the center of the town and sorting out various stuff like paying bills and shopping. It was exhausting and weird, and I'm still a little paranoid when it comes to spending so much time in public places full of people to be completely honest. But I'm very much getting there.
    Gonna start checking other people's topics soon again. Glad to see at least some familiar names are still around.
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  16. Schwing added a post in a topic The mountains are calling...   

    What do you mean by 'detail work'?
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  17. Schwing added a post in a topic Kaizen - The Quest for Neverending Self-Improvement   

    You doing a bachelor's degree? What on?
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  18. Craig added a post in a topic Craig's Journal   

    Long time since my last entry.  I started over yesterday with the help of Respawn.  I'm not sure how I feel yet.  I do feel a relief (deep down) under the nerves and fear.  I'm also excited to start this new chapter of my life.  
    All of the things that were ignored and procrastinated while I was gaming are now all surfacing and "angry."  I know I can work through and will eventually be caught up.  Being "caught up" alone is a time that I look forward to greatly.  
    Ok. Back to work.  Going to read some more Respawn during lunch.  
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  19. Schwing added a post in a topic My journal: Gaming in moderation   

    Consequence? I tried attaching a rubber band to my wrist and smacking myself with it. Didn't help at all. The thing is you just have to maintain the balance in your life between two things. Work hard; play hard. If you didn't do something when you should have done it: who cares? Next time you are confronted with a similar situation remember what happened this time round and say "No I will do it!"
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  20. SpiNips added a post in a topic My Journal - SpiNips   

    Math finals up tomorrow! I've been studying lot and had plenty of fun with mathematics. I find studying maths a lot less straining than studying many other subjects. The best moment of today was joking around at a funny logics exercise.
    I guess my summer holidays begin tomorrow. Phew, It's weird getting to this point.
    Today I'm grateful for:
    Finding mathematics interestingBoxing sackTaking it easier with Bjj this week to get more study time under my beltEncouraging teachersFinal Finals Exam tomorrow
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  21. Piotr added a post in a topic My Own Personal Bootcamp   

    It's great to see you back! Don't hesitate to put negative posts here, it helps to unload emotions. We are here for change, which sometimes comes through pain so negative parts are essential.
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  22. Piotr added a post in a topic Dziennik Piotra   

    Wpis #3
    377 dni temu, zdecydowałem się zerwać z moim nałogiem gier komputerowych
    186 dni minęło od mojego ostatniego nawrotu
        Zdaję się, że mam ogromny talent do marnowania/zabijania czasu. Skończyłem z grami a zaczęłem z oglądaniem seriali toż to jakaś masakra. W czasie detoksu wiele się nauczyłem, a mimo to popełniam tak infantylne błędy i łatwo wpadam w sidła które jedyne do czego prowadzą to siedzenie na dupie i nie robienie niczego co prowadziło by do jakiejś dobrej zmiany w mym życiu. Jak bym miał jakąś pętle w mej głowie w której się powtarza marnowanie czasu a zmienia tylko jego forma z gier na seriale.
        Może już nieco nadużywam mówienia o hobby/pasji, lecz myślę, że to wszystko wynika właśnie z tego, że ciężko mi się ukierunkować na coś innego. Po prostu inne czynności albo są dla mnie zbyt dużym obciążeniem finansowym, albo już jest dla mnie za późno żeby się nimi zająć(np. sport - nikt nigdy mnie de facto nie nauczył  grać w kosza, siatkę czy piłkę nożną, a że grałem strasznie słabo i byłem jedynie pośmiewiskiem na boisku to tym bardziej od tego uciekałem), albo mnie coś zwyczajnie nie interesuje.
    I weź tu człowieku bądź mądry xd.
    Idę dalej rozmyślać nad tym co zrobić ze swoim życiem...
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  23. Piotr added a post in a topic [PL] WYZWANIE 1000 DNI.   

    Zdaję się że twój dziennik zarósł pajęczynami bardzo lubiłeś pisać, więc czemu ucichły twe wpisy?
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  24. Piotr added a post in a topic [PL] 1UP - Time to level up   

    Czekam z niecierpliwością!
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  25. Piotr added a post in a topic Nie wiem... 18 latek z niską samooceną xD kurwa raczej kolejne wcielenie leniwca z wyrzutami sumienia   

    Hej! Miło Cie znowu widzieć!
    Dobrze wiem jak nowe miejsce zamieszkania może wprowadzić pustkę w życie człowieka. Tak jak napisałeś, czasem jest to konieczność ze względu na ważniejsze sprawy. Ja natomiast poradziłbym Ci jedno: nigdy nie zamykaj się na ludzi. Utrzymuj kontakt z kumplami z Polski i jednocześnie staraj się poznać kogoś w stanach. Szkoda marnować życie na graniu w gry komputerowe.
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